-Let My Guard Down-

-Emotionless-

-Heather's P.O.V-

*Back to present day*

My heart sunk when i finally remembered the words i said to Simon, i realized i still had Simon held against the wall, slowly letting go instantly regretting everything i had done for the last two days. Simon shook his head in disappointment and sadness as he turned to walk up the stairs to his room,

'Simon' i weakly said knowing that i could try apologizing but the won't accept considering what i said was so ignorant,

'Someone's got their panties in a twist' Josh blurted out chuckling at his comment,

'What-Why?' i questioned him but not wanting to explain or argue though so i just sprinted down the stairs to avoid any questions.

I stood opposite the door not knowing what to do, either; annoying Simon by begging for his forgiveness but if i was in his position i wouldn't of forgiven me so i can't blame him or just walk away from my problems. My mind was clouded of mixed thoughts and emotions however there is one thing i do know is the friendship between me and Simon is worth fighting for.

I ended up sitting in the garden the same place where things started to go horribly wrong last night, doing my best to think of a plan to get Simon to first talk to me then him to give me a second chance. My ideas were unoriginal or i'm sure wouldn't work as he could just carry on ignoring me but the was one idea that possibly may work.

Quietly tip toeing up to the top floor so Josh wouldn't hear me as well as Simon, when i reached Simon door i listened too see if he was recording, i could hear voices but wasn't sure if they were from previous videos or him talking now. Starting off easy i knocked on his door lightly; no reply, slightly harder; still no reply this carried on for 6 increasingly harder knocks until i was repeatedly punching his door,

'WHAT!' I heard an extremely loud shout from inside the room,

'May i come in?' i ask innocently after i stopped beating his door

'No fuck off, i don't want to talk to you'

'well i want to talk to you' using the same voice as i did before. After waiting 10 seconds i spoke again,

'I guess i'll just sit here and talk to the door.' Sliding down the side of the door i leant against it and started talking hoping that he was listening so it didn't look like i was crazy,

'So about last night, i screwed up bad. I know that me or you will never be able to forget what i said or take it back but i need you to know and understand that nothing that i said last night i meant...'

i spoke for around 3 minutes saying out loud all the emotion and thoughts i had locked away in my brain forgetting that there may or may not be Simon listening on the other side of the door, i finsh my speech by saying,

'although i didn't know what i was saying at all last night, remembering it all this morning has made me see some positive about me acting so selfishly as what i said last night wasn't me that was drunk me just trying to cover up what i was really feeling, knowing that i might possibly of messed up the best friendship i have had in a long time even though have only been friends for 2 weeks. I said all that stuff so i didn't sound weak because thats what im so used to doing but looking back on this morning seeing myself so hurt by you ignoring me proves to me i'm not some emotionless human but i have actual feelings and you made me not feel worthless something and not a pile of shit so i owe you for that, thank you'

I sighed as i waited for a reply or just something that wouldn't make me feel so weak and stupid for admitting that but like many times before still silence.

'I can't believe i just said that, gosh i sound like such a girl' i say out loud but quietly so i could process what i have ranted about.

Getting up feeling embarrassed even though nobody heard me also pissed at how badly my plan worked. i began heading towards the stairs so i could get straight of the house and the bad memo-

'You can be my pile of shit' Suddenly Simon had come up behind me and picked me up wrapping his arms around my body as i do the same with him giggling at what he said.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Sorry for shorter chapter and crappy writing but it's my birthday and i had more than i expected comments on the last chapter so i thought i would do a quick upload, also thank you to those who comment it's really sweet seeing that someone is enjoying this book:)

'The weak can never forgive. Forgiveness is the attribute of the strong.'