-Let My Guard Down-

-Upset-

Moments later I was getting an incoming call from Simon;

'What?' I asked blunty,

'I don't see what I have done wrong?'

'I know when you're lying even on text'

'I wasn't lying!'

'Ok then, you cool with me going to Harry's party?'

'Umm, sure'

'Great i'll let him know' Keeping Si on the phone i quickly told Harry I could go because he was curious what i was talking about,

'Wait you're with him?' Simon questions through the other side of the phone,

'Yep why?'

'What are you doing?'

'None of your business honestly' I say again starting to get pissed of the questions that asks constantly,

'Heather tell me what you're doing with Harry'

'Like i said none of your business for fuck sake Simon!' I cut of the phone call before i attracted to much attention from Harry or nearby public.

'He starting to sound like your boyfriend' I sigh putting my phone on silent and back in my pocket,

'Don't even get me started on him'

'Fine by me, you two seem like you have a lot of problems'.

Harry's right, we've had so many arguments in such a short time of dating. When we were only friends we had a couple of bigger fights but they were over something serious whereas at the moment we bicker over stupid things.

After Harry dropped me home i decided to text Simon;

Heather- We need to talk.

Simon- I'll come to yours, won't be long.

Great at least I didn't need to explain and we wont have to be careful if we are at his. I was sat at the kitchen table when Si entered as he had his own key for some reason that i keep on forgetting,

'Yo whats up' he sits down opposite me,

'I was thinking'

'Well that's never good'

'haha very funny, but seriously in the one week we have been dating the amount we have fought is not normal'

'I know it's a lot harder than when we were just friends'

'If it's easier us being friends then maybe we should break up'

'I didn't mean it like that. Come on you're joking right?'

'No not exactly'

'Heather why are you suddenly being like this? Did something happen between you and Harry?'

'No Simon nothing happened! That's another reason why its not working because you worry about everything and feel the need to constantly watch over me'

'That's because I don't want to loose you, seeing you with other guys makes me jealous'

'but it shouldn't, i'm only talking to them! What makes you think I'm going to cheat on you anyway'

'I don't know'

'Or maybe I'm just some kind of slut that can't be trusted'

'That's not true and you know it'

'But that is what it feels like'

'This isn't worth it' he starts to walk out,

'What isn't'

'You obviously feel differently to how i feel about you. If you can't be bothered to try and work through our fights because it isn't easy then we never last. I want us to work but I can't do anything if you aren't willing to try and get us past the first week after a few fights.'

'Simon I can't do this i'm sorry' Am i making a mistake?

'No i am, for not being good enough' 

'It's not that Si its-'

'I don't care'

He walks out the house. Again another unnecessary fight but this time i have a feeling we won't come back from this. Now i have time to process my thoughts and what just happened already i know i over reacted. However this time i can't blame Simon for anything; I was the one who suggested us breaking up, twisted his words and overall just a total bitch. From the start of us dating all there has been is drama and there are always fights because I have never told the truth in the first place and hidden the actual reason I was upset. So why did I actually start this argument? There are the reasons that i said to him but I would never agree that I have never been bothered to make us work or that he wasn't good enough. The thing that hurts most is that it feels like he doesn't trust me, I have never done anything close to cheating when being with anyone. I would never cheat on anyone whatever the situation after going to heartbreak after Josh. Josh, why do my problems seem to come back to him? Finally I have figured it out, this argument started because I feel upset he can't trust me. I'm ignoring how we feel about each other and i shouldn't let stupid things like this change that.

What do I do now?