Our Greatest Adventure

Chapter 5: 22 Weeks & Counting

As my belly grew, it became a magnet for people. Each person I came in contact with wanted to know when I was due and what I was having, as if they were privileged to my personal life. I would just smile politely, responding as vaguely as possible hoping they would get the hint. It was the strangers who felt they had permission to touch who bothered me the most.

Apparently, when you're pregnant everyone assumes it's an open invitation to treat you like Buddha. From the teller at the Shop Rite to the older gentleman at the post office, everyone wanted to rub my belly. Maybe I could have been nicer when I pulled away or swatted their hands, but they could have asked. I didn't feel like I should lose my personal space just because I chose to grow a human.

"I need a shirt that says, 'Please Don't Touch' in big bold letters," I griped to Jai.

He chuckled as he stood at my stove sautéing chicken in a large skillet. I wanted to walk up behind him, wrap my arms around his waist, and rest my head against his back. Despite his hideous Boomerang style beard, he still was the sexiest man I'd ever laid eyes on. Watching him be domestic, his muscles bulging from his loose black t-shirt I was doing my best to push every dirty thought from my brain.

"Hmmm?" I asked, as our eyes met.

Jai smirked, "I said we could just put a big picture of me growling on a t-shirt and it would have the same effect."

"Good idea," I agreed with a smile.

"You know I was thinking," Jai began as he sat the skillet down on the table amongst the side dishes. "And I want you to let me talk before you say no."

Picking up a soft taco shell I asked, "How do you know I'm going to say no?"

He chuckled, "I want you to come with me to Toronto. At least for a little while. Just to test out the waters."

"What waters?" Responding with another question, was better than proving him right by saying no.

"Someday, Jellybean is going to be old enough to travel and I want to be with her as much as I possibly can."

I shook my head, "I thought we agreed that I would take care of her here. That we didn't want her to be bounced around between me and you."

"I definitely agree with that," He argued, keeping his tone light and neutral. "I'm not saying she could come stay with me, but if I have to be on location for awhile I thought you might want to bring her to see me."

"Jai, you know how I feel about traveling."

"Which is why I'm suggesting we try it out now. Figure out what you're comfortable with and what you aren't comfortable with. I just want to be with my daughter."

I bit down on my lip. Hearing the sincere pleading in his voice was enough to wreck my heart. I could see him trying, doing everything he could to be there for me. He was doing everything but splitting his body in half to be with me and balance his work. My selfish anxieties held me back every day, I always made the decisions that were best for me. I never had to think of anyone but myself, which is probably why I still only had one friend.

If this co-parenting arrangement had even a chance of working out, I'd have to give him more than I already thought I was, which wasn't much.

"Ok, I will come with you for awhile," I agreed, swallowing the lump that had formed at the back of my throat.

He lifted his head in surprise, "Really?"

"Yes, but only if you agree to waiting until Jellybean is a year old to travel with her. It's going to be hard enough for me to learn how to parent the first year of her life, let alone trying to figure out how to balance traveling with a newborn."