Fall for You

Seven

7| If I were Him

Later that day, I brought Marcus in our house and introduced him to my family. He knows our story so it's not that hard to explain things. My father threw questions on him. 

He answered his questions smoothly. He's never lose his composure and confidence. 

We had our dinner and my father seems to be impressed to Marcus. 

He should be. 

Marcus is the only son and their family owns hectares of lands in Davao. They also have shipping company and they supply goods to top restaurants in the country. And at a young age, Marcus is already an achiever.

By the time we're about to leave, it already rained cats and dogs. We decided to stay for the night. Kuya Rolf invited his friends so Marcus didn't have anywhere to stay to, so I invited him to my room. 

He seems comfortable since it's not the first time we stayed in this room together. We already f-ucked several times in this room years ago. 

And I didn't expect him to show some respect or what to my parents. I am actually expecting him to screw me all night. 

It still look the same

He said as he roam his eyes around my room.

It is. I've never been in this room for a long time. The last time I am here, I'm with you

He look at me then smile. His boyish smile that haunted my dreams. 

I've missed you. I tried contacting you, but I never succeeded. 

I saw yearning and sadness in his handsome face. He stood up then hug me. 

His hug is different from his other hugs. It's warm and it felt like home. 

I can feel the tears pooling on the side of my eyes. I hug him back. 

I want to tell him that I love him. That I went away to stop myself from loving him, but I failed. That after all those years, I still love him.

I cupped his face then kiss him gently. He kiss me back with longing.

I want to tell him I love him but I am too afraid to lose him if I did. 

Because I know, he doesn't love me the way I want him to.

I wrapped my arms around his neck and deepen the kiss. I miss him so bad. 

He kiss me back with the same need. 

He starts stripping me and I did the same to him. 

Oh, how I miss his warmth. 

I want to cry as I felt his lips on my skin. I want to cry for the years I miss this warmth. I want to cry for my feelings that can't be returned. I want to cry for the pain I keep for years. 

How I wish, I could cry my love for him then lose it in the process.

When I was a little girl, I used to picture love as the most blissful feeling anyone could have. I felt giddy for the fairy tales I've red, for the romantic scenes I've saw, and all the rapture love could offer.  But with the kind of living I grew up to, I lose that idea. I saw how my parents suffered and sacrifices themselves to satisfy that love. Love won't pay for the bills, love won't feed their children, love won't provide for our living. And in the process of satisfying what love can't give, they lose their love. They love money and all the prosperity it can give instead.