Fix it

Confide in me

When Stevie arrived at her condo, she owned without Lindsey's knowledge, her lover was already waiting for her. It was enough for him to take one look at her to know not to ask her why she was late. It was cloudy outside and she was wearing sunglasses, that telling him she had been crying. He opened the car door for her, while she reached for her handbag, holding his hand out for her to help her get out.

"Thanks for coming."

"Anything for you, you know it." A glimpse of a smile on both of their lips as he leaned in closer and kissed her on the cheek, catching the corner of her mouth too. "Should we go inside?"

"Yeah, I don't need any pictures of us on the internet."

Stevie fished for the keys in her bag, as she led him through inside and to her floor, all the while feeling his presence close, which gave her a sort of calming effect. She unlocked the door and entered first, leaving him to close the door and lock it.

"You can take off those shades, I know you've been crying." He said, taking a step towards her, pulling her in against his chest. "Do the pair of you ever not fight?"

"If I overlook everything, then we don't argue. But I can't, not anymore, Don... I'm trying, I really am. I cooked us breakfast and asked him to join me, but he was short and snappy with his responses. Then I started yelling, he told me to leave. I did and smashed some things, he probably felt bad for a split second, because he came to the bedroom, babying me and asking me to come out. He noticed I changed my clothes and asked where I was headed. I told him it wasn't his business, that he didn't actually care anyway, so then he started shouting and called me a bitch, saying he's over it."

"Oh, baby..." Don sighed, stroking her back, as they stood embracing each other. "Let's take a seat."

"No, I want to lay down with you for a bit." He nodded and she took him by the hand, leading them to the bedroom, as they got in bed and she snuggled up to him.

It could have been ten minutes or an hour, when Don asked as softly as he could. "Why are you still married to him, Stevie? You seem so unhappy."

"Because despite everything, I love him still. My relationship with Lindsey has never been easy, we would always have to fight to be together, to stay together, fight everyone else off that would try to intrude... Honestly, if I didn't have this feeling like after no matter what, he's still my whole world, I would have given up a long time ago. But I can't. I can't imagine not being with Lindsey. It's... you know, Lindsey and Stevie, always. If we got separated, the way we would drown our sorrows would be to call each other and have angry, painful sex. We hate each other, but just us much we love each other too. It's always been this way."

"I wish I knew how that felt."

"What about your wife?"

"I do love her, but I could never say things that you did about Lindsey."

"Why do you need this affair?" She asked, lifting her chin up to see his face.

It took a moment before he could muster an answer, a truthful one that is. "Because I miss you. Because things ended between us so badly, I thought you would hate me forever and the fact you find solace in me means more than you can imagine. I know I've hurt you, I... to this day, I feel like I've taken away a chance from you to be a mother." She heard his voice crack and it was hard to believe the things he was saying. "If not my selfishness, we would have had a child together and I can't imagine what the hell was wrong with me that I didn't support you in keeping it. So, even after all that, here you are with me, able to confide in me... Of course, you're also a stunning woman and I'm not going to say still, because you never changed."

Her own tears began to fall, as she wiped them away quickly and lifted herself up on the elbow, leaning in to kiss him. "I mean that much to you that you're risking your picture perfect family?"

"We're far from perfect, Stevie." He said, placing his palm on her neck, his thumb stroking the side of her face. "You're the only one that keeps me happy in my old age."

They smiled at each other, as she kissed him again, letting it escalate into a make out session, that unfortunately was cut short. 

"I wish I could stay with you here and not ever leave, but... I have some things to take care of."

Stevie nodded in understanding, pulling away. "Yeah, you said you didn't have much time. Still, thank you for giving me an hour, it really helped me."

"Hey, what do you say we spend a weekend together? Somewhere not in California. I could look around and rent us a cabin or something, I... I would really love that."

"As would I, but what about your wife and Lindsey? Okay, Lindsey won't even notice, but her?"

"I'll think of something. I'll tell her the guys decided to celebrate the new album, just the band and crew or whatever."

"Are you sure?" She asked, hugging herself around the middle as she accompanied him to the door. 

"Are you?"

"Yeah. I hope we get to do that." She smiled, genuinely this time and he got closer, giving her another kiss. He turned towards the door, but before he opened it, she stopped him. "Don?"

"What?"

"You asked me whether I loved you. Do you love me?"

A somewhat sad, longing expression crossed his face. "I'll call you about that getaway."

Stevie sighed heavily, closing the door, after Don left. How is this fixing my marriage?, she asked herself and went to gather her things, to head back home as well.