A Web of Spider Bites

Chapter 9

Bell sat there staring straight ahead as her anxiety starts to take over completely. Bell hasn't always had anxiety, she hasn't always worried about simple things because for a long period of time she couldn't care less about most things. It's hard to care when you know everything will be taken away from you at some point; what have you got to fight for? The beautiful green eyed girl struggled enough with depression: getting out of bed, looking after herself, keeping friends and family but she just couldn't keep her walls up forever. Once you have let your walls down unwanted things start to come in and that is exactly what happened to bell: the one demon inside her wasn't enough so he called up his best friend, Anxiety. 

It's hard to balance depression and anxiety; with depression you lose interest and motivation with everything, with anxiety coming after it starts to work itself up because it knows things need doing but you've lost the motivation. They contradict each other causing the unlucky victim to crash and burn. You're trapped in a hellish circle of caring too much but not enough to do something about it and no on understands so you can't talk about it, leaving you in a spiral to hell. 

Bell doesn't know what Ben has planned inside his colourful tattoo sleeve which owns his skinny arms, but whatever it is- it couldn't be worse than the demons in her weak tormented mind. 

Ben doesn't know what he is doing but he won't let that show. That's one thing he knows, not to let Bell see how weak he is. He has to look strong and tough so that Bell fears him. He doesn't know where he is going with this whole mess. Will he kill her? Keep her and see how long she last? Hurt her just to feel power? 

Ben has no idea, Bell has no idea, it's just a guessing game for all. 

"Now." Ben starts saying as he picks up a shiny silver blade that reflect the slight bit of light that shines through a crack at the top of the walls. "You're gonna regret not respecting me." He said smugly. 

Bell did nothing but role her eyes. "Why?" She thought to herself. 

"What?" Ben says sharply. He saw the green eyes role and her plump red lips move but didn't hear anything. 

"Why? Why will I regret it? You really think I'm scared of death or pain? Look at me, I'm a broken doll and you think I'm gonna be sacred of being hurt? Look at me, I abuse myself. Do you get what that means? I hurt myself. Myself." Bell snaps, clearly upset about what she has done and how weak she is. 

"You do that because of your past, no one loves you Bell, that's why you do it." 

"That's a lie. I did it long before people stopped loving me." Bell snaps again with more anger behind it. Tears are welling up in her eyes. "They stopped loving me because they saw me for me, the messed up me, the real me." This time her voice softened like she was coming to terms with the truth over again.

"What makes you think that?" 

"It doesn't matter." 

"You're wrong Bell" Ben knows he getting under her skin so he keeps pushing. 

"I'm not" 

"You are" 

"No I'm not" 

"How do you know? What makes you so sure?" Ben asks as he gives her one last push. 

With one last shout Bell proved she was right. "My Dad left us because he found out I was depressed."   

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Sorry it's so short!!! I will do a better one next time, I just needed to get this into the open. It should get better now.