Through Thick and Thin

Chapter 5

a couple months later

Nancy Pov

We all ended up murdering Jay last month , he doesn't deserve to live after what he did , and jail isn't any kind of punishment.

I've been home alot going through depression, anxiety and paranoia.. My life is like a non ending rollercoaster.

" Nate .. Why does bad shit happen to me ?"

Me and Nate were sitting on my bed watching the movie Dope.

" .. Do you really want to talk about this now. " he said staring at the TV and reaching for popcorn.

" yes , Nate. " I said taking the bowl of popcorn and sat Indian style staring at him.

" Nancy .. You want the truth?" He said turning toward me .

I looked in his eyes , and knew he was gonna either say some really hurtful shit , or too true ..

" Nancy , Baby girl.. You let niggas take advantage of you. Ever since ya so called 'first love' Eric cheated on you with Yani you've gone downhill and only fucked with no good ass niggas. Nancy .. Open ya fucking eyes . Them niggas was never there for you , I been there for you since I could even speak ya damn name Nancy fucking Zarae Jones. "

Next thing I know he pulled me close and kissed me passionately. It took me a moment to think about what had happened..and I pulled away ,

"Nate .. What the. hell. was that." I said catching my breath.

"I'm sorry Nancy."

" don't be . " I said holding his hands.

He looked me in my eyes .

" Nancy .. I.. Its a lot of stuff on my chest , and now is not the time to tell you.."

What the fucking hell .. You just tongue fuck me with no explanation.

" Bye Nancy.." He said as he kissed my cheek and left.

I flopped back on the bed and called my best friend Lacee she answered on the 2nd ring.

" HEY BIITCH."

" hey.. Uhm we Needa talk.."

" Scale code ?"

"10 mf."

" I'm on my way."

She pulled up in 5 minutes and I had on my sports bra , and my Nike jogging pants with my hair in two French braids.

" girl what is the big 411."

I swear she talks like it's '07 still. ole Mexican ass.

I layed my head on her lap as I told her what happened ,

" Girl Hop On That Chica. He Gonna Find Someone New And Forget About You."

I sighed and sat up ,

" Lace .. These men aren't good enough for me.. Why do I give them the time of day ? My tears break the real Nancy into a weak Nancy.. I was tough ass , beat anyone , smack anyone , bad ass Nancy.. "

" it's okay baby girl , let it out. "

She rubbed my head and I just cried. I've changed so much. Damn man. I'm not even the same person I was a few months ago.

I picked up my phone after wiping my tears and turned on Pandora . Unfaithful came on. I just broke down..

Story of my life .

Searching for the right.

Cause it keeps avoiding me.

Sorrow in my soul ,

Cause it seems that wrong

Really loves my company .

He's more than a man

And this is more than love.

The reason why the sky is blue.

The clouds are rolling in.

Because I'm gone again.

And to him I just can't be true

And I know that he knows , I'm unfaithful.

And it kills him inside

To know that I am happy with some other guy.

I can see him crying.

I don't wanna do this anymore.

I don't wanna be the reason why.

Every time I walk out the door ,

I see him die a little more inside.

I don't wanna hurt him anymore

I don't wanna take away his life..

I don't wanna be ,

A murderer.

I turned over and heard slight snores from Lacee . I rolled over to the side of her and went to sleep next to her.

Please excuse any mistakes in the chapter

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