roommates // muke (discontinued?)

0.8

*michaels pov*

eventually, after luke actually fell asleep, i moved back to my bed so he would sleep better. i didnt want to take up a lot of space on the small dorm bed.

i was listening to more romantic-type songs and filing them into a playlist when i heard him yell first.

"stop! get away from me!" luke shrieked from his bed, shuffling around in the off-white colored blanket.

"luke!" i rushed up from my bed and went over to lukes, seeing his face scrunched up in terror, but his eyes still closed.

"get away from me! stop it, michael!" what?

"luke, baby wake up!" i grabbed his arm, not knowing what to do.

"s-stop, you cant do this michael! i thought you loved me! someone please help me!" luke wailed, making me let go of his wrist quickly

i bit my lip hard to distract from the aching i was feeling inside. hes dreaming of me hurting him, he must be. but what could be causing this? the only other time i had heard him yell like that is when he said "he'll doesnt like me and he never will!" but that mustve been a much different scenario.

"luke, please wake up," i cried, shaking him slightly. he jolted awake, sitting up fast and hitting me in the head as he did so. "ow, fuck."

luke was breathing heavily, looking at me with wild eyes as i held my throbbing forehead. "shit, michael im sorry. i was just having a bad dream."

"i know. i could hear you..." i trailed off and he covered his mouth with a shaky hand.

"w-what do you mean?" he whispered, moving so i could sit next to him.

"you started yelling. things like 'get away from me!' and 'someone help me!'" i said, not mentioning him saying my name in the mix of these phrases.

"im sorry if i woke you up," he muttered, and i pulled him into a hug, where i noticed him flinch slightly, making my heart hurt.

"its okay, youre fine now." luke hid his face in my chest and i smiled sadly, his loud pleas of help echoing through my head.

"can you stay with me, in my bed? please?" he asked is a quiet voice.

"of course i can. i love you, dont forget that." i placed a kiss on his head and he smiled before falling against his pillow. i looked at the clock to see it was 3 am, and im probably not going to be able to go back to sleep.

i racked my brains to think of a song to sing to help me fall asleep, because it genuinely makes me tired.

"everything is blue," i sang quietly, hoping not to wake luke up. "his pills, his hands, his jeans. and now im covered in the colors pulled apart at the seams. and its blue."

my eyes shut slowly as i hummed the words to the halsey song thats been stuck in my head, and i drifted off into dreamland.

***

i woke up to an empty bed and the sound of water hitting the shower tile. i sat up and yawned before i noticed another sound coming from the bathroom.

"where are you? and im so sorry!" i heard luke sing from the bathroom. "i cannot sleep, i cannot dream tonight!"

i stood up and walked silently towards the door to listen to his singing.

"i need somebody and always, this sick strange darkness comes creeping on so haunting every time!"

i listened as he sang on the rest of the lyrics and i guess i didnt notice when i joined in, harmonizing with his voice.

"dont waste your time on me, youre already the voice inside my head!" we sang in unison. i kept singing the words, not noticing luke had gotten out of the shower and was standing in the doorway, looking at me with a smirk.

"hey, michael." i jumped and looked up to see him standing with nothing but a towel, and holy shit he is beautiful. "can you move so i can get to my clothes?"

i nodded, not being able to catch my breath to say anything because fuck, im in love.

"nice singing, by the way... i loved it." luke smiled at me and i blushed. i blushed.

"thanks, you too," i muttered stupidly.

"you should do it more often." luke seemed to be avoiding a topic and i wasnt sure what.

"are you okay?" i walked over to where he was pulling a blank tank top over his head. he looked at me for a second before nodding. "dont lie to me luke. please tell me whats wrong."

luked sighed and looked at me sadly before hopping up on his bed and patting the space next to him. "i guess its time i told you."

"what is it? you can tell me anything." i wrapped my arm around his damp shoulder that i could feel through his shirt fabric. he looked at me sadly.

"do you remember when i wouldnt come to school for long periods of time, and you would make fun of me afterwards?" luke asked, making my face flush red in regret. i nodded slowly and he moistened his dry lips, not looking me in the eye. "there was a reason i didnt go. it wasnt because of school specifically, or being sick, or anything like that..." he trailed off and i tried to meet his eyes.

"what, luke?"

"i was hiding," he whispered. "i was hiding from my dad. he hit me michael." a tear slid down lukes face, followed by more. "he hit me a lot. i remember him always being drunk, i dont remember a day when he wasnt. and he would scream at me," luke choked up before breathing in deeply and continuing. "he would scream things like 'its your fault' and 'youre just a worthless f-f...'" He didnt say the word, but i got the idea. "i ran away every single night, but i always had to go back. i couldnt be homeless. eventually, he just left. he left my mom and i alone. he used to push her around too. i still have nightmares about it." luke was sobbing uncontrollably and i didnt know what to do. i only added to his misery during that point in his life. im such a dick.

"luke, im so sorry," i pulled him as close to me as i could and he wrapped his shaky arms around me, crying into my chest. "i have something to tell you too."

"w-what do you mean?" he looked up at me with his puffy red eyes and i bit my lip.

"you know when i woke you up because you were screaming?" he nodded. "well, i didnt really tell the whole truth about what you were saying... luke, were you dreaming about me hurting you?"

he looked at me sadly, only confirming my thoughts.

"im sorry michael. i dont know why it happened. i just dreamed you in place of my dad... you were completely drunk, and you were mean and-"

"the only thing i care about is if youre okay." he chewed on his lip before nodding and hugging me again. we laid back on the bed and stared at the rough textured ceiling, holding each other in the silence.