ARIES- assault and battery
TAURUS- armed theft
GEMINI- high treason
CANCER- stalking
LEO- violent protest
VIRGO- hacking into the IRS
LIBRA- political fraud
SCORPIO- sex with a minor
SAGITTARIUS- drunk drag racing COOL
CAPRICORN- tax evasion
AQUARIUS- running a meth lab
PISCES- drug usage and distribution