Standby (A One Direction Fanfiction)

Chapter 6- Fix her

Molly’s POV

“Great! I’ll pick you up at six?” Niall asked excitedly.

“Sounds good! I’ll send you directions”

“Alright see ya later Molly”

“Bye Niall!” I clicked my phone off and rushed into the bathroom. I had three hours until six, but I decided I was going to curl my hair instead of just leaving it wavy, which takes at least half an hour if not more. The rest of the time I’ll spend trying to sort out my clothes to pick out a nice outfit.

I normally wouldn’t care much about what I wore, except that there had to be long sleeves. Yes, Niall already saw my scars, but I don’t want anyone else to see them, especially anyone from the media. I didn’t need any rumors going around about me, or bad publicity for Niall. I would put an extra amount of effort to find a good outfit for tonight though. I just wanted everything to go well..

My brown hair has gotten lighter since the weather has been warmer and I’ve been outside longer, now it was more like a light copper brown.

Once I curled my hair to my liking, I put on some eye shadow, I used really light shades of brown, just enough to make my eyes stand out. Then I put on some mascara, thin eyeliner, and some concealer. I glanced at the clock, it was five, I had one hour left.

I rushed to my closet and began to sort out my clothes. I wanted something spring-like. Like a dress, but I also needed a jacket because it was going to be chilly tonight. Then I found it. My off-white dress that was cut off a few inches above the knee, it had a sweetheart neckline, but with a thin see-through, higher up, neckline. It matched perfectly with some dark brown tights, and my greyish sweater that I just bought over the weekend.

(Picture on the side)

 I smiled and went back to the bathroom to change. I stripped down to my underwear and bra to reveal the scars across my stomach. I ran my fingers over the small bumps.

You’re fat

Worthless

I ignored the voices, they’ve been going away. I think. But now they just come out of nowhere, and it scares me. Usually I would be able to tell when I was getting bad, but now, I didn’t even have to be bad for them to show up. But at least they were quiet when I talked to Niall.

I slid the tights over my legs and then zipped my dress up. I grabbed my sweater as well, and added a few bracelets and a necklace. I’ve been getting into the whole “hipster” and “vintage” styles lately. I don’t know I just feel like they’re more expressive.

I walked past another mirror that I had by my door. Normally I would have any other mirror besides the one in the bathroom because last year I broke one, and well… I was having a rough time, and it was the first sharp thing that I could find.

When I looked in it, my eyes seemed to shine, there was a light inside of me that was struggling to turn on, it would flicker sometimes, but it would usually turn off once the darkness overtook it.

Like now.

I could feel my head begin to get clouded. My thoughts becoming numb. I felt like I couldn’t breathe, and my heart was pounding so loud. I quickly sat on the floor, accidently knocking over a few books off a shelf, and closed my eyes. I didn’t need a panic attack right now.

I tried to control my breathing, and find something to focus on. Like Niall. Focus on Niall. I pictured his face. His bright blue eyes shining and laugh ringing through the room.