Cracks in our Souls [BWWM]

17. Just Us

The next day

It was about 2:00 in the afternoon and everyone was gone. Me and Logan never went to dinner. Matter of fact I haven't seen him since our talk in the car.

I felt shitty about everything even if I wasn't all my fault. I gave him chances to tell me how he felt but he pushed me away. I didn't make it easy for him to tell me. I sat at the kitchen table folding clothes.

"I'm fucking bored." I said loud.

"Want to go out?" Logan said from behind me.

I jump and turned to him making him slightly smile.

"Where have you been?" I asked.

"I got my car in the shop, had to walk back." He took his shoes off.

He walked to his room removing his coat. I started folding again when he walked out. He was just wearing his jean and nothing else. His hair was slightly wet from the snow and I was getting pretty wet to.

"Hey?" I said looking at him.

He turned to me and waited.

"Turn around." I said turning my finger.

He smiled and started turning.

"No, slower." I said smiling.

He turned slower till his back was to me. He looked at me over his shoulder and winked at me. I laughed and sat the towel I was folding down. I walked to him and wrapped my arms around his neck.

"I'm sorry." I whispered to him.

"Yeah, I am to." I said wrapping his arms around my waist.

He softly kissed me and looked at my eyes. He did say anything just looked at me.

"I'm in love with you Violet."

"What?" I asked suddenly.

"And you're my girlfriend."

"I am."

I was shocked a little but more so happy. He grabbed my hand and pulled me into his bedroom. He sat on the bed and so did I.

"Remember when you told us about your mother." He said playing with my curls.

"Yeah."

"I want to tell you about my grandmother." He said nervous.

I nodded turning my attention to him.

"Well my mom and dad are rich so my life was always nice. I had money and on top of that my two best friends. I my parents lived in Ireland and my grandmother lived with us. Dame I loved that woman." He stopped talking and smiled.

He laid back on the bed and grabbed me pulling me on top of him. He intertwined our fingers smiled and I smiled back.

"She was everything to me I loved her more then my own mother. She got lung cancer and she just went down hill from there. She was my dad's mother but he didn't care at all. Me and my mom would just sit with her all day and my dad would walk pass us like a empty room." He looked away from me.

I bounced on him and he looked back at me.

"I got up in the middle of the night and saw him turning off all of the machines. I ran in trying to stop him but he just slapped me and said a man takes what he wants he doesn't ask for it. I didn't get it then but when I got about 16 and we moved here I found out all the money was grandmas. When she died he got everything." I looked away anything.

It's understandable why the guy doesn't want to fall in love again. He saw the one woman he loved basically murdered in front of him.

"The advice your dad gave you, you live by that don't you." I said.

"Why do you say that?" He asked smiling.

"You took me." I said smiling back.

He chuckled at my comment and released my hands.

"Yeah I guess I did but you took me first. I always had panic attacks and talked in my sleep. Since I met you I don't anymore, I don't think about that day. I think of you more then anything but I didn't want to love you. What if I can't protect you? What if I'm not strong enough." He huffed.

"When Jess got raped I wish I could have stopped it from happening. When Leanna visited her dad's grave I wished I could take her hurt away. Make her forget what he did to her. David and Mason are my brothers and Jessica and Leanna are my sisters. If I can't protect them, how can I protect you?" He closed his eyes.

I moved my hips on him forcing him to look at me. 

"I know the feeling all to well. I wish I could have stopped what happened to my mom and dad. I always feel that in some way it's my fault she's gone. My dad lost his wife and my brother lost his mother because of me. I complained to her how I didn't want to dorm and she died just to make me happy." I said with a cracking voice.

He didn't talk just looked at me. He sat up wrapping his arms around my waist. He kissed my lips softly, then my cheek, then my neck. He looked me in the eyes putting his nose on mine.

"Nothings your fault."

I kissed him softly then parted my lips forcing my tongue into his mouth. He opened for me, pulling me closer to him. He pulled back when someone knocked on the door.

"Who's that?" He asked.

I shrugged my shoulder and stood. We walked to the door together. I reached for the door pulling it open.

"Gareth!" I yelled jumping to him.

He laughed and hugged me back.

"I've missed you to!" He said pushing me back.

I pulled him into the house and he stopped to look at Logan. Logan stared at him intensely.

"Gareth this is my boyfriend Logan, Logan this is my cousin Gareth." I said grabbing Logan's arm.

He looked down at me and I mouthed "no" to him.

"Nice to meet you again." Logan reached out his hand.

"Like wise." Gareth reached his hand.

They shuck hands and they both gave me a sarcastic smile.

"Vi how about you and me get lunch? We need to catch up."Gareth said wrapping his arm around my neck.

"I'm kind of busy here, how about me you and Logan get dinner tonight." I looked at the both of them.

They both seem to want to say no but I gave them my best puppy face. They both smiled and nodded.

"So, great meeting you again. I still don't like you and I need to go and my love to your cousin. So bye." Logan said quick.

"Logan!" I yelled.

Gareth started to laugh and looked at me.

"Real charming guy you got." Gareth kissed my cheek and I did the same.

I walked him out noticing he had a new car.

"You got a new car, can I keep the old one?" I asked.

"Sure you can." He said getting into his car.

Logan pulled me back into the house.

"Let's get back to what we was doing." He reached up squeezing my breast hard.

I jumped and smiled at him. I couldn't believe this but I love him to.