Cracks in our Souls [BWWM]

20. I Know

The next day I woke up at 6:15 and was out the door by 6:49 I didn't want to deal with Logan or see him. I must have broken a recorded with my two day relationship. I drove over to Gareth house to see if my dad was back. I walked into the house but it was empty. I sat on the couch and looked around.

This was my real first time I was alone in a long time. I didn't like it because all I had was my thoughts and I didn't want to think. I looked at the brown rug and my mom popped up in my head. She's dead and it's halfway my fault.

I missed her so much and I love her even more. She would know what to say about my problem; she would know how to fix them. My vision blurred and I started to cry. I wish things could just be right for once.

"Baby!" My dad yelled coming out of the hallway.

I tried to clean my face but it was to late. He looked at me sadly and came closer.

"Is this over a boy?" He said sternly.

"It's nothing." I said with my voice cracking.

"Don't give me that shit, what's wrong?" He almost yelled at me.

I looked at him and his anger only made me sadder. I started to cry again reaching for him. He moved closer and I hugged him tight.

"I just love him so much but I keep messing things up." I cried out.

He just hugged me back waiting for me to calm down some. After a little I stopped crying a let him go.

"Sweetie, you love this boy? You where with that George boy for years and you never said that. You only been here for almost 5 months and your in love." He said looking at me.

I just nodded to him and sat back on the couch.

"I don't know what to do, it feels like I'm going crazy. It's like he's to scared to love me back, like he's waiting for me to break his heart." I said still emotional.

My dad huffed and sat back in his chair smiling.

"Your mother and I got married after knowning each ing for a month." He said laughing.

I didn't know that but my mom was a very careful woman. This didn't sound like something she would do. That's stupid to marry someone that quick. You don't know them yet and maybe it's not love just lust.

"She was tuff nut to crack back then. She was always looking or waiting for something to go wrong. She drove me up the wall with it and we broke up one day. I couldn't stand it anymore and we where married for only two months." He said still smiling at me.

"Well you only knew each other for a little time. You should have known that was going to happen." I said sitting up.

"Yeah but once she moved out I missed her so much. She was apart of me and I couldn't live without her. I spend day angry or crying and sometimes just sad. I had tons of girlfriends and sometimes just girls for...."

"Dad that's gross."

"Yeah, the pint is I had a lot of girls before her. I was with some of them longer then two months. It took a week or two for me to see it but I was in love with her. I loved her the day we met but I couldn't see it yet. Two days after we broke up I want to her and she was just as sad a depressed as I was." His smile faded into frown.

"Us not being together was just as hard for her. That day she moved back in then a few weeks later we found out she was pregnant with you. Nine months later she gave birth to the love of my life." He looked up at me smiling.

I smiled back at him feeling warm on the inside. I was the love of his life, I missed my dad more than I thought.

"All of that happened in just three months. If you love this boy the way you think I don't think sitting here crying is the answer. I'm not saying marry him and you better not get pregnant. But I am say don't give up too easy, some people aren't easy to love but there worth it." He pulled me over to him and kissed my cheek.

"Stop this loud crying so I can get back to my nap. Mia and Jason will be back in three hours and I want to sleep and watch the game." He said rolling away.

I smiled at him and stood. I checked the time and it was 12:36. I was here for a while, long then I though really. I went to my car and pulled off. My dad was right I shouldn't give up even if Logan makes quitting look good. I stopped in front if the house and walked in.

I didn't see Logan so I knocked on his bedroom door. When it didn't hear anything I walked away. I sat at the kitchen table bored thinking of what to say to him. I walked to my room grabbing homework and started doing that.

*********

I checked the time and it was now almost ten. I finished all my homework, cooked my self lunch and dinner. I was taking a shower and going to bed. I didn't know what happened to Logan and the other I didn't want to bother.

I stepped out the shower wearing my panties and tank top with no bra. I walked into my room and closed the door. I looked at the ceiling for almost a hour when I heard keys. The keys fell on the table and the sound of Logan's bedroom opening.

After a little I heard the shower come on. Dame this house was silent without David and Leanna here. I closed my eyes for just a second but woke up when I heard a knock. I looked at my door but before I could talk he pushed the door open.

The house was dark so I couldn't see him but I could smell him. I didn't talk and he didn't either. He walked to my bed side and eased my cover down. He pulled the cover to the ground and crawled between my legs. He grabbed the hem of my panties and slowly pulled them down. He tossed them aside and lowed his head.

His mouth attacked my button and I arched my back. I grabbed the sheet in my fist as I already felt my climax coming. I loudly moan as my rise hit me hard. That was quick for me but I really missed him. I grabbed his hair pulling him up to and kissing him hard.

I wrapped my arms around his neck and my legs around his waist. He pushed into me slowly making slow hard movements. His pace was steady and I moved my hips at the same pace. He broke the kiss nibbling  at my bottom lip. I moaned softly and he moved to my neck.

He jerked a little and moved to my neck. I could feel my climax again and I pushed my legs down on this waist pushing him deeper into me. I held him still inside of me and he pushed even deeper making my climax hit harder. I convulsed around him and he grunted out his release.

He looked at me and moved off the bed. He grabbed my cover a placed it over me. I felt sad that he was leaving me but I still didn't talk. To my surprise he crawled into the bed with me. He wrapped his arms around me placing his hands on my stomach. His breath hit the back on my neck and I cuddled into him.

"I love you." I said softly.

"I know, I'm sorry." He said softly to.

I intertwine our fingers and he kissed the side of my neck.

"I love you too." He said falling asleep.

I did the same falling asleep lost in the smell of him.