It All Started Here (Harry fanfic) *Editing*

Chapter 43

I woke up, embraced in Harry's warm arms loosely. The cover had been pulled over my body yesterday, I had fallen asleep after my little talk to my beloved brother. 

I moved a little in his grip, which resulted in him holding me tighter against him. I felt his chest move as he breathed.

Knowing this week could be the last week with him until Christmas, it's just killing me! It's hard to think of leaving the one you love for this long, without being able to talk. And all for me to recover. Is it even worth it?

Yes, it surely is. I mean, Harry's right, otherwise I'll end up killing myself. So yeah, I surely needs this help. But I'm still unsure what to do.

I sighed, and turned around so I was facing Harry. He was asleep, mouth half opened and messy hair, while snoring softly. I touched his curls gently, not wanting to wake him up. He kept snoring, and I smiled. He was adorable!

He shuffled in the bed, pulling me against him so my head was resting against his chest. I wrapped my right arm around his torso, and let it be there. I didn't want to get up, not when he finally was off, and asleep. He don't need to worry about anything in his sleep. 

I feel kinda bad for making him worry about me like this, when he also worries over the band, the music, the arena tour. He don't tell me, but I can see that it worries him! He works way too much for my liking, and have way to many things to worry about.

Maybe I should go then, to give him less to worry about? I mean, if I'm there, he don't need to worry that I won't eat, they'll check me there.

It maybe would be good for both of us if I go, not just for me! It would be like a vacation for him I guess.

Shit, my life is pretty messed up... I never thought it would go this far, but it did... And Harry still blames himself for it, even though I told him not to! It's not his fault that some fans writes mean things to me, it's more of my fault.

"Stop thinking so much." Harry murmured.

"Shit, did I wake you up?" I asked worried.

"No, I woke up all by myself!" He said in his morning voice, smiling slightly.

"You want me to make breakfast?" I asked sweetly, looking up at him from his chest.

"No, I want you to lay here with me, and don't think of that rehab for a second." He sighed. 

"You knew I was thinking of that?" I frowned.

"Babe, that's the only thing you think of for the moment."

"But I need to decide what to do..." I mumbled. "I can't even believe they didn't send me there right away." 

"I won't comment that." He mumbled, and hugged me. I moved myself up a bit, and had my face in the crook of his neck.

"I should go..." I said in sudden realisation. I looked up at him, and he had a shocked expression. "I should." I whispered.

"You sure?" He asked, and I saw his eyes getting watery.

"No, not completely. But I have to, it will get better for both of us." I mumbled.

"How can it get better for me?" He asked confused, and frowned.

"Because then you don't need to worry about me." I shrugged. He sighed, and stroke my back carefully.

"If you really want to go there, I'll call them when we get up." He smiled sadly. "You'll probably go there in a week or so, so that leaves you time to pack." I nodded, feeling quite grown up by this decision. Last time I left the people I love, I was forced. It was against my will, and now I choose it, knowing we will meet again!