My Life As LGBTQ+: Volume 1

Attention Seeking

I know I just literally just updated a few hours ago, but my brain just won't stop thinking. I also have gotten barely any of that project done since I last updated, so that's not very good.

Right now, I'm feeling kinda shitty and I hate myself a little, not gonna lie. Sometimes I express my shitty feelings to my friends or on twitter or on here, in hopes that maybe one of my close friends will see it and ask me whats wrong. I do that not trying to complain or gain sympathy from other people, but because I need someone to help me get rid of the shitty feelings or to help my brain understand that I'm not as bad as I may think.

I saw a post on Tumblr a short while ago that said something along the lines of "I'm having a breakdown but I'm not going to tell people about it because that's attention seeking." Immediately, I felt guilty for all the times I've ever told people that I'm feeling down or shitty. I regretted ever single time I've ever needed help to make myself better or needed someone else to boost my self-esteem.

But you know what? I really shouldn't. I shouldn't regret needing someone or expressing my shitty feelings or complaining sometimes. Attention seeking is often seen as something you shouldn't do or that it makes you a bad person. While this is true in some situations, I feel as though that seeking attention from friends or peers for help or simply just to rant is not at all a bad thing. Complaining is a natural thing we want to do. No human on this earth will always be able to deal with their problems and inner thoughts completely alone. We all rely on each other in some way shape or form, and relying on others for emotional support is no different.

A word of advice, please try to not feel annoying or like you are wrong for wanting attention from someone else (depending on the situation). If you have something that made you feel a certain way, whether it be happy or sad or whatever, and you want to tell someone about, I don't care what that reason is, you do it. Seeking validation from others is never a bad thing, and it sucks that a lot of people make it out to be a terrible and pathetic thing. Validation is something almost every human craves to some extent, so please don't feel bad for wanting it.