Flight 407

Dans POV ~ chapter 10

   This chapter is dedicated to Sophiefijma

Thank yo so much for your comments and support it really means a lot to me❤

A/n- First, I just wanted to thank you for 209 reads! That's crazy! When I first started writing this book I remember how existed I got because of 2 reads and I still do, I apparitiante each and every one of you so much!

Anywhise, back to the 10th(!) chapter which is on time for once which is nice and it is pretty long and i like it a lot. 

also I'm expecting to update very soon 

love and hope your enjoying so far❤ 

Dans POV

We are sitting in our sits, the arm rest obviously raised (as it had been the whole flight) my head is resting on his chest and were sharing headphones, listening to muse on shuffle, everything is perfect but I can't get myself to enjoy it, The situation is the most relaxed, calming situation possible, but I can't relax because in one fucking hour I'm going out to 'the real world' where i know everything is going to change and for once in a long time I actually have something to lose.

I wish I could just stay here, live on this plane, I have everything I need here, wifi, phone, tv, books, music, not the best food but still food and most importantly, Phil, the only person that makes my hart flatter and makes butterflies fly around my stomach by simply talking, and when we kiss, god, the kisses, they might even be as good as the feeling of his warm breath, chilling my neck but making my everything else burn, and when he whispered in my ear, he can literally whisper 'I'm going to take the trash out' and it will still be one of the sexiest thing I'd ever experience in my life. Jesus Christ, I'm turning into one of those poetic-relationship people that just can't shut up about love and hearts and shit, but I can't stop, because I never experienced anything like that, the last time someone liked me back, was well, never. I know my dad loves me and i like to believe my mom still has a small place for me in her heart, maybe she'll even talk to me again one day, if she'll be sober enough, I really don't know, but what I do know, is that right now, sitting besides me completely lost in the fictional world of his book is one of the hottest, funniest, genuine, amazing people I ever got to meet, and he likes me back! And right now, that's all that matters.

****magical time skip*****

There's only 30 minutes until we get to London and if I wasn't relaxed before, it's nothing compared to the way I feel now, I'm officially freaking out, I can't feel anything except for shear panic and fear that Phil has been lying this whole time, maybe he just feels awkward because I'm sitting next to him and the second we get there he'll run away, or that he'll be too embarrassed to be seen with me, and who can blame him? i mean, he is so hot and prefect and what am i? just some ugly loser he feels bad for.

the thought of it makes my heart shader and my body is shaking slightly

"Are you okay Bambi?" Phil says pressing a soft kiss to the top of my head

"I'm just a little scared" i cuddle closer to him, taking every bit of warmth and safety he can give me in case it will be the last time I get to be this close To him, or close to him at all

"That's okay, I'll just hold your hand like I did in takeoff, there's nothing to be scared of babe" he cooed at me

Ohhhh, he thinks I'm scared of takeoff, I mean I'm a little nerves, but thats not even close to how terrified I feel about him leaving me, no, abandoning me, to be alone, again, not to be able to cuddle close to him when I'm scared, or hold his hand, or hug him while crying, barring my head in his shoulder, or feeling his worm breath against my skin or the way his lips feel against mine, when our bodies are so close that it feels like there's nothing else in the world except for me, him and our hot breathing and small sounds that manage to escape our lips.

And than, like i have no control on my mouth whatsoever, it came out

"That's not what I meant" I blurted it out as a whisper, and I hoped he didn't notice it, but of course he did

"What do you mean?"

"What, oh um, you know what? Don't worry about it, it nothing, really"

He lifted my chin and our faces were so close are noses were basically touching "you know I can't do that" his voice was low and caring and as much as I tried, he didn't let me turn my gaze from him, and he was staring into my eyes intensely, yet he wasn't forcing me, it was out of shear concern "please" he pleaded

"It's just tha... I've been... I..." I didn't seem to manage to form a sentence and looked into his eyes pleading for help, he nodded ,showing me he was still listening and took my hand in his, squeezing and rubbing it gently "it's okay, take your time" he reassured me

"I'm scared that you've been lying this whole time and that you're gonna leave me the second you get the chance to"

"What?!" Phil used THAT tone, the one i was painfully used to coming out of his moms mouth

His grip on my chin loosened and I averted my eyes to look on the floor,my body tensed, ready for the hit, I felt his long, worm arms wrapping around me tightly, pulling me into a hug?I wasn't used to it, my mom hits me when she's med or just very drunk, her hurting words always coming out in either drunken slurs or using that tone, but louder.

Phil must've felt the way my body tensed because he was now whispering lightly into my neck "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to snap like that, it just hurts and frustrates me that you think so little of yourself, you think a lot less of yourself than you should,your an amazing person, beautiful, funny, smart, creative, if anyone should be afraid someone will live it would be be, Dan, I like you so much it hurts, it scares me how much i like you. I just, i don't know, i guess i wish you trusted me more, that's all"

I breathed out, I wasn't used to hearing those kind of words and it broke my heart hearing the way phil feels, and I know I should work on that, letting people in, it was just so strange for me, I always had to have some kind of wall serenading me, and now Phil's asking me to break it, and it's hard for me, opening up to Phil as much as I have by now almost felt like too much.

"I'm gonna try" I hesitated for a moment "I promise"

Phil looked deeply into my eyes "when we get off this plane, nothing, and I mean nothing is going to change the way I feel towards you"

And I chose to try and believe him

For now.