Art of soucide

Chapter 6

Edward told me all about how ex prep bellamy was rly me.

"the reson she wos such a retated prep and pozer insted of being goffik is becase.................................................................................................................................................................................."

he pased dramaticly. "she is u"

i gasped,

"But im GOFFIK BITCH!!666 (geddit)" I yelled at him and i began to slit my wrists agaen. but then Blackness Nyte Vampyre bent over and bit me goffickkly on the neck and i stopped.

"but she ws the opposite of you cos she woz from..........an alenate dimenshion"

"dut bhen how did she get to America?" i sed

"Because a long time ago there was a group called the Volvorys who came from planet Plato. they wanted to take over the world with PREPS and POZERS so dem they went to preplanddimeshiunon and they relesed all the props so dem dey could destroy and crush the goffikal world with praisers cos they hate goffs cos theye preps. and Prep Bellamy woz you from the elternate dimenshion and she is a prep becaus you are so foffik dat she was the opposite and woz a big prep. deyre going2 kill ppl like garad way and linkin pork and my chesial roamence and theyll replas dem with moley citrus and Prep batnay."

as sun as I relized tat Prep Bellamy woz actully me as a prep i began trying tears of blood. They stormed down my limpid what face like blood. "WHY DID SATIN MAKE ME SO GOFFIK" I scremed down to hell "ITS NOT MY FUALT IM SO HOAT.

"it sucks because ppl wil masticate 2 u n fal in luv wif u!" Emilie Autumn sed.

Darkness Nyte stored deeply into my blood red eyes and said under his breast: "But its not ur folt satin mad u so bury (geddit) goffick!!!666(geddit" he said. "its just teh way (geddit like garad way) of deaf (geddit insted of life gos its gaffk)

"but i willl have to seduct the Volvos with my body" i sed with blood ramming down my chin.

Suddenly Nyte Vampyre got angry. His eyes turned red and black wangs scrotumed from his back. his head turned around (lyk in teh exsercisest but moar goffik) and he began scramming to Hell.

"DEM PREPS ARE JUST PRAZTALZ AND POZERS I H8 (geddit its fofgick instead of luv) U ENOBY!!!16"

then he begun strapping me and we did it rite there and then. After that we put our clocks back on and me and Emilie and Edwem got back in2 dem Bladder Crumets van and drove home where i lay in my coffin and fort abut how i wud seduct the Volvok with my body.