𝐅𝐈𝐍𝐃𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐌𝐄 ↠ 𝐓𝐨𝐦 𝐇𝐨𝐥𝐥𝐚𝐧𝐝

chapter 5: support group

"Sit with the pain until it passes, and you will be calmer for the next one." - Naval Ravikant

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THE rest of the week went by fast. I kept my mind set in a vision on what I wanted to see, ignoring the outside noise and just trying to make it to the end of the week.

The "bitch" squad haven't messed with Emily since that day after school. I see them around more often in the halls and the cafeteria. I never noticed them until that day I punched one of them in the face. The blonde headed girl, Whitney, has been giving me death glares ever since that day. I ignore it, and usually focus on something else.

Austin has thanked me numerous times for helping Emily. I question their relationship with him being over protective of her. Are they dating or is it a deep friendship? I honestly don't care enough to ask.

And I made the big decision on going to that support group my parents were talking about. "You don't have to say a word. Only listen," my mom said with joy upon my agreement.

It was after Thursday night when I had another bad dream again. It was about my friend Lacey back in Minnesota. The overwhelming feeling of grief consumed me as I woke up sobbing as my lungs felt like they were going to collapse. I knew I needed this to stop. I had a problem and I needed all the help that I could get.

The support groups are every Wednesday and Saturday. I choose the Saturday one to get it over with. My mom dropped me off in front of the place and told me good luck.

I breathed in hard before opening the door to the building. It smells of febreeze and scented candles. I follow the chatter coming from the large back room. I go through the door and find about twenty people talking to each other and eating food at the long buffet. At least they have snacks here. 

The black, foldable chairs are turned in a giant circle with gaps inbetween each seat. The sun shines through the glass windows onto the blue carpet. They tried their very best to make the place feel comfy.

"Skylar?" someone calls.

I look around, hearing a familiar voice calling my name.

Austin comes from behind a large group of people, heading towards me with a sincere smile.

Not him again. I go to head back out to the door, leaving this place and never coming back. He grabs hold of my arm, holding me back gently. His grip is light, his hands warm enough for me to feel underneath my black hoodie.

"Hey, where you going? You just got here," he says.

Turning my head towards him, I rack through my brain for an excuse. "You see, I have the wrong building. It's the one next door," I say, walking to the door I came in through.

Austin tugs me back. "Skylar," he says.

"What?" I ask annoyed.

He crosses his arms, the sincerity in his eyes making me weak. "What are you truly doing here?"

"Nothing....." I trott off. I don't need anyone I know knowing that I'm here. It's embarrassing to me honestly. I don't like that fact that I need help, much less the one person who annoys me the most knowing this secret of mine.

He studies me and I feel dissected. "Skylar, I'm all game for you being here but if you're gonna be the sarcastic, rude Skylar, then this isn't the place to do it."

My blood immediately boils. "Then I'll leave," I say, turning back around.

He grabs my arm again. "No, I didn't mean it like that. Look, I'm sorry. It's none of my business why you're here, it's just some people here have some serious problems they're dealing with and they're not the "joking" type of people," he explains.