Noticed (BxB)

*RaeMal*

Shit I already know yall not feeling me. Yall think I'm a fuck up nigga and I treat Alex like shit, but that's what yall see I'm not a bad nigga, I love Alex with all my heart hell I wanna marry his ass. He means the world to me and I don't wanna lose him. I'm not going to lose him. So hell yea Ima beat and fight a nigga for him, but this moment not even bout him. Real talk...this shit bout me.

See when I was about six years old my bitch ass of a father was abusive. He used to beat the shit out of me my lil brother Hovah and my mama. Hell yea come home every night drunk ass fuck and commenced the ass whooping.

I used to hear him talk to my mama like "bitch you aint shit without me" or "I'm yo God hoe." That shit use to drive me mad and trying to be there for my mom's he would stomp my ass out for trying to play captain save a hoe.

Then one night all that change for the worst moms was stressed and depressed because she lost her job and we didn't have no food to eat. Yea I did what could do but I was a kid. Pops came in drunk as usual, starting in on us, but my mom jump up to defend us and then they got into it. Of course, he beat her, but this was the last time he did.

Moms draw on my pops putting 5 hot ones in his back. He dropped dead to the floor. Hovah crying and moms crying I'm crying but not like them. The tears were running but I was trying to be strong and take in what just had done happened. Then moms looked at me and said

"You a big boy now, time to be a man baby. Take care of ya brother."

Then POW!!!

She sprayed her brain all over the front door. See even then I didn't understand why she did it. I didn't come to realization until I noticed we was still sitting in the house with their body's laying in the same spot for three days. Hovah asking me was mom and pops was gonna wake up. Then I realized they was gone.

Filling my soul with more hate. She left us, why the fuck she leave us like this. I was only 6 bruh. Finally calling the cops (well the old lady across the street came over being nosy) we were put in an orphanage they tried to separate us, but I wouldn't have it. But even then, shit wasn't happy we were in the orphanage for about six months and one day. Haven't seen my brother none that day.

Come to find out he was being raped and bully by a couple of the other niggas there. So overwhelmed by it all him committed suicide, hung himself on the basketball goal. Did I cry? Nah... I was mad because now I didn't have my brother. I couldn't protect him because he's dead. Leaving me here in this world by myself. Then finally I met a nice family and they adopted me.

Shit life was starting to feel like it was turning around. Hmm...Fuck I thought! I end up for the next 7yrs being my step brothers bottom bitch. Both was raping me and to think I would tell? Nope they parents were ballers...but yea I got ghost.

Ran away came down here met up with some lost fam, found my uncle he did all that legal shit to get me. So yea I live with him and I run in the streets with him. He a big known drug dealer got mad pull in these streets so shit filling the void of anger I go into that life now I'm running these streets too. It's a family business.

Shit I'm only thirteen years old and got more guns then a police officer. But my uncle wanted to keep me clean, so he put me in school that's when I met Alex. He was fine as fuck, lil skinny ass yellow bone. He was cool too, we met at lunch one day I was sitting by myself. He came over and spoke. Shit we hit it off from there. I chilled over his house later that day while his folks were gone. Watching some Netflix.

"Aye you got a nigga?"

I asked.

"No... I'm just about myself right now don't want one. You got a boyfriend."

"Shit hell yea."

"Awe what's his name?"

"Alex"

I said being upfront. Alex looked at me and laughed but I was dead as serious.

"Well You cute RaeMal but I'm a virgin and I'm not ready."

"Well shit fuck that...Ima be yo nigga now, so I think you ready"

I said climbing in the bed with him. I already figured Alex wasn't really all that tough it was easy to make him fuck. And damn his shit was hella tight. Popping his cherry, he bled all over my dick, but that shit was so good I didn't want to pull out.

He moaned like a girl, biting me on my shoulder and scratched up my back. Hell yea I was thirteen but fucking like a grown ass man. My uncle always said

"Nigga or bitch if they aint screaming and moaning you aint doing it right."

Alex didn't come to school the next week. His aunt took him to the doctor that when they found out he was gay. Damn I fucked his shit up, but the next time I saw him he was mines. We were in the gym class I'm playing basketball and he over there dancing on some nigga. Hell yea I got mad. I walked over and tackled his ass.

"Meet me after school we need to talk"

After school let out. We met up at his house. That was the first time I ever had to put my hands on him.

"Bitch you my boyfriend!"

I scream punching him. I beat on him like one of those helpless bitches in them movies. Told him straight up we together now and I'll kill him if he ever do that shit again. And we been together ever since then, but fuck up thing about it is that I love him but I'm not bout to let him leave me. Fuck that he mines.

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