The Most Dangerous Kind of Love

Chapter Thirteen

The Most Dangerous Kind of Love 13

The cool breeze blew around us in the warm end-of-summer night air. I tucked a loose strand of hair behind my ear as I sat down on the cushioned bench. Jason sat on a chair across from me and leaned forward so that his elbows were on his knees and his hands were clasped together.

When he didn't raise his head to look at me, I started to frown. "You... you really don't want to talk about this, do you?"

Jason raised his head so my eyes met his pained ones.

"I never had a say in anything I did," he started. "It all began when my parents died."

"Jason, you don't have to-"

"Let me go on, Channing," he cut me off. I hesitated, sensing that this was a touchy subject, but when I nodded, he continued. "My parents were my everything. They were my rock. I didn't used to be a rebel or anything like who I am today. But when I was twelve, my parents were murdered in front of me..."

I gasped. "Jas-"

"By my brother."

My hand shot over my mouth. I wasn't expecting that at all. I didn't even know he didn't have parents, much less that they were murdered! And by his brother, at that!

"After that, Alex and I were taken under Ralph's wing. He raised us after that. But he was already in a lot of messed up shit. People wanted him dead, he owed people money... the list goes on. He's the one who originally got Alex involved in everything, who then got me involved. At first it was just minor things: go get a part needed, drop something off at a buyer, or assist while he built. After a few years, he taught me how to build bombs, saying that I would need to defend myself at some point. I learned quickly like I do most things. By the time I was fourteen, I could build a bomb that could take out a casino and everyone in it. I also learned how to handle a gun and fight so that I could defend myself. By the time I was sixteen, I was helping out on jobs alongside Alex, Ralph, and the other guys you saw today. I was basically a killer underneath what you see on the outside."

He paused and shook his head.

"Jason, you don't-"

"I never realized life could be different. I never realized that I could actually have had a life that didn't involve killing people. I never knew what it was like to have feelings because I was always taught to be emotionless. I never knew that I should have gotten away from all that. Do you know why I changed and realized all this? It's because of you. I don't know how you're not freaking out over everything I'm telling you because it's illegal. It's not good stuff, Channing. I hate that I got you involved, and I'm sorry that I did. I hate that I've been involved in all this shit, and I hate that I couldn't get away from it. I hate that this was how I grew up. I hate that I could never tell my feelings about this to anyone because the only people I ever cared about were dead. I hate that I was never smart enough to figure out how to leave Alex and Ralph. And I just... I hate what my life has become."

I say there with wide eyes taking in everything he just said to me. I was not expecting him to open up that much. He had kept everything bottled up for his whole life, and he couldn't tell anyone any of it. I realized that he hated how his life turned out, and that he really did hate dealing with all the bombs and guns and stuff.

"But," he continued, making my eyes snap to him again. "You made me realize all that Channing. You made me realize that there's something worth fighting for. When they took us today, I didn't know what they were going to do to us. I just knew that I had to keep you safe. I know now that its because I really like you."

I smiled. Standing up from the bench, which was really more like an outdoor couch, I walked over to where Jason was sitting.

His eyes followed my every move, and they pleaded for me to say something.

I climbed into Jason's lap, and his arms immediately wrapped around my waist.

"Thank you for sharing all that with me," I whispered before I kissed his cheek softly.

"That's it? You're not going to run away screaming? You aren't going to go to the police after I just told you I've killed people, and I make bombs?"

"Why would I? In case you haven't noticed, I like you too."

That earned me a smile from him and a kiss to my forehead. I matched his smile and rested my head in the crook of his neck. Jason's arms tightened around me, making me feel secure.

"Even though you do all that, Jason, you make me feel safe. And I trust you."

"I'm trying so hard to be gentle with you, Channing," he said. "I'm not a gentle person by nature. I'm used to destroying things, and I'm pretty damn good at it. But I want you to feel safe around me."

"Mm, I do."

"I'm glad."

We fell silent, and I listened to the sounds of the wind rustling the trees while replaying the conversation Jason and I just had. I bet he has never opened up to anyone like that before, or told anyone anything that he just told me.

"It's why I'm so dangerous to be around, and I've told you that from the start," he said out of nowhere. "It's why it's dangerous to have feelings for you."

I looked up at him, urging him to continue with my eyes.

"I could put your life in danger just for being friends with me. But if we were more... you could be used against me of something bad were to happen. You would be the deciding factor."

I shrugged. "Who cares? Lets worry about that if the time comes."

I felt a rumble of laughter echo through Jason's chest, making me smile. It was amazing how this boy could literally kill me in seconds, yet I was so comforted be him. I knew he wouldn't hurt me.

A yawn escaped my mouth as much as I tried to hold it back.

Jason chuckled. "A little tired, are we?"

I nodded and snuggled into his chest more. He was so warm and inviting. I don't know what brought on these feeling so suddenly today, but I really did realize that I really like Jason.

"Come on, lets get you to bed," he said. Picking me up bridal style, he carries me back into my bedroom and to my bad. After skillfully pulling back the covers while still holding me, he placed me gently in the bed and pulled the covers back up.

Just as he turned to go, I grabbed his wrist.

"No goodnight kiss?" I asked.

Jason chuckled again, but bent down and placed his soft lips on mine. Fire started in me again, spreading from the top of my head to the tips of my toes. And when he pulled away, the room felt cold without him there by me.

"Goodnight," he said softly.

"Goodnight," I replied, drifting off into a peaceful sleep.