And I ended what seemed like my perfect day, in tears. Because I didn't know if you were ignoring me, or you decided that you no longer loved me again. But it hurt. Fuck it hurts. It fucking hurts like hell and every bone in my body is shaking because I don't know what's happening and I know I'm probably just overthinking. But that's what my mind does. That's what my mind will always do.
So I'll smother myself in your sent from your clothes as I cry myself to sleep, my bones will shake until it feels like they'll collapse. I'll bite my lip so hard that it bleeds, so my mother doesn't have to hear me scream. Just because I'm the one who's killing myself slowly again. Because I have to fucking overthink everything. I don't want to. But I do it anyway.
