Speechless (Muke)

DAY 7:

Words For Mikey: Day 7

Cognizant: having ; aware (usually followed by of): He was cognizant of the difficulty.

You were awake. For five God damn minutes you were awake. I didn't even get to see your eyes. The second you started shaking there were doctors everywhere and I was getting shoved out of the room. I tried screaming for you but they wouldn't let me through. And then everybody stopped doing pretty much everything because they had put you right back into your coma. Brain swelling. They told us it was because of brain swelling. Your brain activity had increased so rapidly and then it still to almost nothing and somehow that made your brain swollen or something. They said if they hadn't put you back under you could suffer major brain damage and possible retrograde amnesia. The only problem is your body isn't stable either. As your brain activity is so low some of your organs aren't working anymore and now they think you might die. They told us you have a two percent chance, Michael. And I will hold onto that two percent with everything I have because it is my only hope dammit. I need my Mikey back. My little kitten. I'll buy you one if you come back. We could get any kind you want. It could be brown or black or white or purple for all I care. I heard animals can make you happier too. I'll buy you the whole damn world if you wake up for me baby. The whole world.

I love you,

Luke

"Luke,"

The name had simply become a word with no meaning to it. There no longer seemed to be any person attached to it for all the reaction it had, but when it came from the mouth of the doctor in whispered tones it certainly had an effect on those who were not named Luke, but who knew the boy and cared for him dearly.

"Luke,"

This time the word was granted a soft blink from the one it belonged to, but no words of acknowledgment were shared and no nod or incline of the head either.

"Calum he isn't going to answer you," Ashton finally said stating the obvious truth.

Calum had been at it for nearly an hour simply repeating the blonde boy's name hoping and praying for some sort of reaction.

"I know, Ash, but I can't give up yet,"

Calum's head hung low and Ashton placed a hand on the back of his neck directly in between his shoulder blades and rubbed slightly.

"I don't expect you to, Cal. Just come get something to eat with me,"

It had become a code. They would say it when the doctor wanted to talk to them about Luke.

"What is it now?"

"I think they're doing a half off deal for the cinnamon rolls," Ashton lied with a pointed look in Luke's direction.

Calum steeled himself and got up to follow Ashton with one last look at the statue that had once been their best friend.

Once again the doctor was plagued with the knowledge that his news would be bad. It was all he ever seemed to bring to these people and he longed for the day when he could tell them things would truly be alright.

"We were thinking Luke should talk to one of our specialists," he began. "It seems almost as if he's dealing with a minor form of PTSD. Sleep deprivation, nightmares, a wavering sense of reality. We believe that if Luke talks to someone now, things will be a bit easier further down the road,"

Tatiana held tight to Liz as she shook with silent sobs and Ashton gripped Calum's hand as they talked with the doctor about what was best for Luke. That was the majority of what they did. They talked about Luke without him there, they made decisions for Luke without consulting him. And they thought they were doing well at keeping it a secret.