SSSSSSSS! The GHD straightener sizzles as it moves down the dry, bleached and extended hair of the "Cleo Bachelorette of the Year", that title was a long time ago, but no one in the suburbs knew of Rapunzel's demise as she had become a recluse. Let us go back a few years and see where this all went wrong.
Rapunzel had been rescued from many years in the tallest tower you could ever imagine, whisked away to a romantic marriage with Prince Charming. She owned the gleaming white mansion, with stunning views of Balmain beach in Sydney's North Shore, while spending holidays on the Great Barrier Reef. This was not to last, ever since the Sydney Morning Herald released a scandalous story about Prince Charming joining E-harmony and running off with the MUCH YOUNGER Cinderella to a faraway place ... Canada.
Rapunzel was of course shocked and embarrassed about the situation and had made Sunrise publish a fake story about all of it. Rapunzel was quoted by saying "their marriage did not work out because she wanted to have children but Charming barren." Since Rapunzel no longer had Prince Charming's income, she was worried and needed to think of ideas to support her lavish lifestyle. She decided to sell her locks on EBay at $200 per plait.
The plaits sold as quickly as the tickets for Taylor Swift. Rapunzel went to the closest hair salon she could find that was open and unfortunately, the only option was an old building with a looming smell of cigarettes and expired hair spray. Ironically the business had supposedly been voted the best local hair salon in 2008 by Mama Mia.com. The dodgy hairstylist was eating Marvelous Creations while cutting off Rapunzel's locks using a pair of bent and blunt scissors. Rapunzel walked out with her hair looking like porcupines that were all having bad hair days.
Weeks had passed and Rapunzel was forced to put her house and the tower up on RealEstate.com. She had a few takers such as Fairy God mother who had found it too far away from far, far away and Spider Man who did not like the height and he had trouble sticking from wall to wall as he found it to be too slippery. Also Shrek had interest in buying the tower because it was far away from all the people but unfortunately, he had no way of getting up to the tower for he was too big and fat. Eventually, it sold to Big Brother as he thought it would be a good location for the next season of Bid Brother.
Now we are back to the beginning where Rapunzel began to let herself go, eating numerous 'low fat' strawberry cheesecakes and drinking hundreds of Coke Zeros. She had put on long dip died extensions and constantly bleached her hair. Everyday she would cake her face with foundation and 'eye defying' false lashes. You will be interested to know that Rapunzel entered Australia''s Next Top Model. This ended with Alex Perry and Charlotte Dawson fighting over awful names to call her. Needless to say she did not make it through.
Meanwhile, Prince Charming and Cinderella were all over the news announcing that they had eloped and were adopting twins together.
Having heard the latest news, Rapunzel spiraled deeper into depression and wanted to get rid of her dated look. She marched into Myer's Blow dry Bar and demanded to be given a punk look. After hours of coloring and cutting, straightening and spiking she emerged as the new Pink! No, black she decided. She became happier with her new style and engaged with a new group of friends. Rapunzel was proud to call herself a new age "Punk".
Rapunzel recreated her own "happily ever after" in the year 2013.
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Craziness √
Humor.~*~. This is a bunch of madness, some of it might not even make sense. If you wanna have a little laugh, then this is the book for you. (NB: there is broken language; GC as one would call it. Guyanese Creole) Go ahead and read more. Don't forget to...
