Hood Rich

✖️Chapter 22

*Author's Note: These next few chapters I will be time jumping a lot, just to keep the suspense going and because I wanted to try it. So pay attention to the dates or you'll be confused!

Minnie POV

| 4:23 p.m. Saturday after noon |

I miss him. And when I say that I really mean I miss his smile. I miss his voice. I miss his laugh. I miss holding him in my arms. I miss checking on him every five minutes. I miss everything about him. I miss him so much I can literally feel my heart aching. Usually when people say that they mean their feelings are hurt. When I say it I mean it. I can feel the pain in my chest. I start to cry every time a memory flashes through my mind. I've been crying since it happened. I've been crying since I seen it. I've been crying since a week ago. My eyes are swollen and red, my head aches, my heart hurts. I don't know what to do. And the fact that I don't know what to do doesn't bother me. The fact that I can't do anything about it is whats bothering me.
Now all I do is sit and stare out the window. Praying and wishing I would wake up from this nightmare. Begging God that this isn't real and that I'm somewhere dreaming it all.

I don't eat. I dont sleep. I just sit here. I don't shower. I don't talk. I just sit here.

I haven't moved in days. Move for what? I don't have any reason to get up from this spot. I don't even get up to go to the bathroom. I don't have to use the bathroom. It's as if my whole body shut down. A part of me wishes I could numb these feelings. Make the pain go away.  Stop the memories from flowing. But then again, another part of me wants to hurt. It wants to feel guilty. Because even though this was nobody's fault, deep down I know I should have been keeping a closer eye on him. But I didn't. I payed attention to everything but him.

That day plays over and over in my head. Like a movie. No, like a commercial. It never stops. It's like my mind is taunting me. 

And Tez...

Poor Tez. He's almost worst than me. He checks on me every now and then. I can hear the pain in his voice. It sounds like he's suffering. Sounds like he's being tortured.

Other people have been checking on me too. Asking me if I'm ok. Asking if I think about him. They don't say his name because they think I'll break if I hear it. They think they're being polite, but I think their being weak.

A wife who loses her husband is called a widow. A husband who loses his wife is called a widower. A child who loses their parents are called orphans. There is no word for a mother who loses her child. Thats how awful the loss is.

I don't want to be that person. That person that no one knows what to call. That person that lost their child. The person who everybody filters what they say for.

"Hey Minnie." Chyna greeted walking in.

I didn't respond. I never respond. Why should I respond? This is mostly her fault. If she wasn't making stupid decisions I wouldn't have beat her ass.

"You missed the trial ,you know."

I still never responded. I wish she shuts up. She's always talking. Asking me if I'm ok and if I need anything.

"You need to eat something." She said sliding me a plate with 4 donuts and a glass of orange juice.

I looked at the plate and rolled my eyes before staring at her hoping to make her feel uncomfortable.