camp

chapter 17

silence filled the small cabin as i finished stretching and zain came from the bathroom. it was awkward, oh so awkward. he gave me a glance but it was quick and more of a glare. i just wish i could understand how he works. i know that i screwed up, i just wish i knew how. he isn't easy to read, and i don't get the vibe that he will tell me either. 

maybe it's just spending too much time with me? maybe he doesn't like being close to someone for so long? maybe he just doesn't like me anymore? i mean, we haven't talked about our feelings since that day, so it could be possible. ugh, i don't know. why does he have to make everything so awkward?

i quickly check the time and see that its 12:00pm. since its sunday, we don't have any activities. so i guess i'll head to the lake. i haven't been there in a while, and i could really use the time alone in a beautiful setting to clear my mind. 

i slowly and quietly make my way to the bathroom with my bag of clothes. i do what i need and then pick out a white shirt and some grey joggers. i slip them on and walk out of the bathroom. i see zain still on his bed, his back is facing me so i quickly step into my shoes and start to head out. 

i have such a strong urge to turn around and look at him. i can't believe how strong the urge is. but i can't, i can't look at him. it'll only hurt more. god, why haven't i left yet?

"why's it feel like you're trying to sneak out?" my whole body freezes as i hear his voice. 

"i-i wasn't, i just, i-" my words struggle to form on my lips and i hear him chuckle. 

"it's okay. go ahead. go wherever." i hear him lay back down and of course i turn around. he looks so sad and i know its all my fault.

"no." i'm not sure why i said that, but i did.

"no?" he asked, sounding annoyed.

"no. i'm not going anywhere until you talk to me." i cross my arms and he sits back up to look at me.

"i am talking to you. what more do you want?" okay, well that hurt.

"i-why-just forget it." i shrug, giving up on all hopes of us.

"exactly. just go to your boyfriend." he spoke coldly and i felt myself die.

"wh-what are you talking about?" i asked, getting annoyed now.

"oh, don't act stupid. you and kyle? yeah, i know. did you think i wouldn't?" he's on his feet now, slowly inching closer to me with every word.

"zain.. i-i'm not with kyle?" i said, with a hint of confusion in my voice.

"don't lie to me! i know he likes you and yesterday you proved that you liked him too." he's right infront of me now. i don't even try to understand what he said. i just know that i want to be with him, and i want to show him that.

i quickly pulled him into me. i wrapped my arms so tight around him, there was no way i was letting him go.

it took a while, but he soon wrapped his arms around me. his grip was just as tight as mine, and there was no possible way that i could be faking this smile on my face. 

"i'm sorry." he sighed as he rested his head on my shoulder, "i should've known you wouldn't date him." 

"what made you think that would even be possible?" i asked as we pulled away.

"ugh, its so stupid. it was a joke, but kyle said he liked you and that he was gonna ask you out yesterday. i don't know, i started to believe it after i saw you guys cuddling. i just, i don't want to see you with anyone else. and i know that's selfish, but i like you. and i want to be the one that gets to cuddle you." my heart is beating a million miles an hour, i can't believe what i just heard. please make it be true.

"i-i like you too. i would've never cuddled with him if i knew it would make you upset. the whole time i was thinking of cuddling you, i swear. i want nothing more than to be with you zain. i want you and only you. i know that we only have a short time left of camp and that we will have a hard time seeing each other after summer, but i don't want to leave here without at least trying. so, zain, will you please go out with me?" the last part was not planned. oh god, what if he says no?

"liam, i-i don't know what to say. i-" i just had to cut him off. i don't want to hear him regect me.

"its okay, i know it was too good to be true." i shrugged as i pulled away from the grip we still had on each other.

"no!" he quickly pulled me back, "you didn't let me finish, loser. i was going to say, that i would love to go out with you liam." he blushed and i quickly picked him up and spun him around.

he giggled as he wrapped his legs around my waist and held onto me tightly. the amount of joy i'm feeling cannot be explained into words. i don't even care if we have a hard time seeing each other after summer, the fact alone that he's mine is enough to keep me going. 

"thank you." i sighed happily.

"for what?" he giggled as i set him down.

"for making me the happiest i've ever been." i smiled and he blushed.

i just hope he knows how true those words are, and how they will always be. 

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