When the day met the night

21

I had warmed to Jared's group of friends, I had a feeling he may have mentioned the way they'd been acting had upset me, so they were all being nice and seemed genuinely friendly. I was still embarrassed over what happened earlier but they all just grinned at me when we turned up to lunch, so I decided to pretend it didn't happen. "So are we going to go out in the morning before we leave? Gotta celebrate your birthday with a good run?" said Stevie. "Yeah I'll see what time I get up, I'm in no rush to get out of my warm bed" said Jared, his fingers trailing around my neck and back. Oh crap it was his birthday, I had no idea. Things had moved so quickly between us that there was still so many things, even simple things like birthdays, that we didn't know about one another. I turned to say something but he put a finger to my lips and said in a low voice, "don't worry I'll think of something you can give me" he grinned, reading my mind! My phone rang a couple of times, it was friends wishing me Merry Christmas. "So Harper, do you have family back home?" asked one of the girls cheerfully. This question never bothered me, but today, being amongst all these close knit friends away from mine, made me feel inexplicably lonely and the question made me uneasy. I plastered on my fake smile, "no, no family, but I'm lucky I've got a few close friends" I said simply, her face dropped, "oh I'm sorry I didn't know" she said embarrassed. My smiled remained, "that's alright, don't worry" I pretended my phone was ringing. "I'm sorry, excuse me won't you?" I got up and walked away, I kept walking until I got to another open lounge area. I found a sofa near a window looking out over the snowfields. What was I doing here? the only time I was content was when I was alone with Jared. I disliked the feeling of relying on someone else for my happiness. I tried not to think of what would happen when I left him, the ache already building in my heart. I don't know how long I sat there, I was still deep in thought when I felt hands on shoulders. "Hey I missed you, what are you doing here all by yourself?" It was Jared. "Oh I took a few calls and I was just having a quiet minute, sorry I didn't mean to be rude" I made to get up. "No it's okay" he sat down next to me. "Everyone's gone off to do their own thing" he said smiling "you okay?" he said looking at me curiously, I nodded, "I'm fine" I said quietly. "I wondered maybe... were you upset when they mentioned family, is that why you left?" he asked carefully, I sighed, "I really did take some calls, but... well, I don't feel the need to explain my feelings to people I barely know" I said quietly. He looked apologetic, "I'm sorry, I'm just saying..." I put up my hand, "I'm here, I'm trying my best to get along with them, they don't need to know everything about me". "I understand, but you know you can't get.. well, prickly, when people ask you stuff, in our business, our job, everyone is going to want to know everything about you, you either tell them or they find out somehow, or they make shit up" he said shaking his head. "Then maybe... I'll just have to stick to small roles, I refuse to have my personal life on display for the world to see" I said firmly, he looked mildly surprised "you're going to give up your shot because you don't want people to know about your private life? Of course you keep some aspects private, you know that" he said, his tone was almost mocking, at least, that's how I took it. I steadied myself, "maybe you're comparing me to some of the other women you've been with who are happy to expose their life to the public, perhaps you need someone like that, someone that matches your own level of fame, I'm obviously not A list material" I said sharply. I knew I was lashing out now, I was being irrational, but I was tired, I felt emotional, the last 24 hours had drained me and this conversation had me feeling defensive. He looked at me, narrowing his eyes, I ignored him and stood up. He put out his hand to stop me but I stepped away. I forced a smile "if you want to continue, I suggest we do it in private, I have no desire to be photographed arguing" I held out my hand, "shall we go?" I said, he nodded plastering a smile on his face as well, "of course" he took it and we walked off. He had grasped it hard and half pulled me to the elevator, "don't drag me along, I'm not a child" I hissed. He just smiled while we waited for the elevator, as soon as we got in, he hit the button for our floor and it headed up. I turned to say something but he gave me a warning look that quickly silenced me. I could feel the anger radiating off him, I tried to snatch my hand away but he wouldn't let go, he looked straight ahead. I couldn't wait to get to our room so I could let him have it. As soon as we got inside, he slammed the door and pushed me against it, his hands on my shoulders pinning me in place. "Don't ever fucking tell me who I should be with, I'm here with you, that's what I want, you're who I want, do you understand?!" he growled at me. I nodded quickly, my heart was beating a hundred miles an hour, he gave a small nod and I closed my eyes breathing a sigh of relief. I felt his lips on me, he started trailing soft kisses down the side of my face, "why are you fighting this, us, why do keep trying to push me away?" he stopped to look at me. His hand rested on my chest, I bit my lip but didn't speak, my heart was hammering, I knew he could feel it under his fingers. "Haven't you realized yet, don't you know?" he said, "know what?" I said vaguely, he had a way of making me dizzy with just one look. He picked up the charm hanging around my neck, his gift to me. "I didn't just buy you this because it was pretty, what you said to me last night.." I suddenly understood what he meant, I looked at him in surprise. "Me too, I'm just shit at saying it" he whispered. He pulled me in tight, kissing my forehead. I exhaled softly and relaxed against him, burying my face into his chest. "I realized it when I left you in London, I hated leaving you in tears like that it broke my heart, that's when I knew..." he murmured. "I wasn't sure.." I whispered. He shook his head smiling, "no more arguments" he said giving me a warning look. I nodded finally smiling. He brushed his lips against mine and murmured, "Come on, I want you to show me how much you love me" giving me a sexy smile he grasped me hands and started pulling me towards the bed. I nodded I couldn't speak, I just followed and I knew that, as long as I was with him I didn't care where he took me.