Somewhere, Someday

78

Song for the chapter- Sad Beautiful Tragic by Taylor Swift

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"Distance, timing, breakdown, fighting. Silence, this train runs off its tracks. Kiss me, try to fix it, could you just try to listen? Hang up, give up, for the life of us we can't get back. A beautiful magic love there, what a sad, beautiful, tragic love affair."

Harry and I were standing across from each other in the bathroom, awaiting for one of us to speak first. Our proximity was close, almost no distance between us. I wanted to move away, because being this close would only want him more.

"What happened, Harry?" I ask, whispering. I decided to break the silence in the room since Harry was obviously not going to. He pays attention to my hand, but I wanted him to look at me and forget the physical pain. I just wanted us to think about the emotional pain.

"My mum got sick." I nod my head, signaling that I already knew that. "When I heard, I didn't know how to take it. I punched up some things, wasn't the best to you, then left for London to see her." I move away slightly from Harry, so I could get a better look at his face.

"Is she doing better?" I ask, hoping the answer was yes and that's why he came back. He could've just come back because she had told him to not waste his time, but I still bet Harry would've stayed.

"Yea, she's doing okay. I'm worried like hell about her." Harry looks down at the ground, trying not to show me any of his emotions. I've seen him cry, smile, angered, everything. He didn't have to run away from me.

"You came back anyways? Did she tell you to just come back?" I ask Harry, moving closer to him again. "You can look at me Harry." He lifts his head, eyes red from crying about his mother.

"I came back because of you and her, I guess." I look at him confused. Came back here for me? He was with some other girl moments ago, he couldn't have been worried about me.

"Liam told me you were done with all my bullshit, which I knew would happen at some moment in time. I got the stupid idea, thinking she obviously doesn't care of I'm back why even call her." I shake my head, thinking Harry has the whole idea wrong.

"Harry I was dying, not knowing where you were. You didn't answer any of my calls, I had to find out from Liam that you hopped on a plane to London. I was awake every night, writing down things that I didn't have the power to say to you. I wanted to love you, I did. But we broke apart, it was a matter of time." Tears were staring to fall down my cheeks as well. Harry was already ready to lose control of his wall, almost letting it break down.

"I was sick, at the hospital still worrying about if you'd ever call me back! I know you had to do this for you and your mum, but it would've helped me if you had just acknowledged I was there." My voice gets louder, out of anger but also just wanting to say the words after all his time.

"It was easy for you to break up with me when you knew about my mum, you had no trouble there! I know I'm shitty and always all to blame for this, but I just needed some time alone and away. Anyways it seemed you have no trouble finding a new asshole to love anyways!" Harry was yelling too now, pacing back and forth in the bathroom, practically enraged.

"Who? Luke? He's gay, Harry, nothing more than just a guy I used to get back at you. Who the hell was the girl on your lap anyways?" My breathing was becoming irregular, at loss for words at why Harry was mad when he had his own toy.

"Let me remind you we broke up! Fuck, Sarah make up your mind. Do you love me or not?" Harry's voice gets low by the end of the statement. The truth will change him, but lying will help my case.