Until I see you again

Training for Fools

      I was tied to a chair once again, Dillan was in front of me, he wasn't going to untie me. I was trembling, I wasn't necessarily scared, but my heart was racing. I stared at nothing in front of me as I sniffled.
        Dillan was taking out a syringe, this was phase two of the 'training'. They were going to give me a mild dose of a drug, I don't know what, but it was clear, with a tint of blue in it. Although I hated him, I trusted him more than anyone else in this... Place.
He tapped the end of the needle and a drip came off before he walked over. I quickly looked up at him, meeting those golden eyes before he nodded. He understood. He could see the anxiety in my eyes.
"This won't hurt, it's like... It's like being on laughing gas... But makes you sad." He whispered, his voice was calm and reassuring. Like it was before this. "I know you're scared."
"I'm not scared." I responded quickly, taking a deep breath. I don't know if I was lying, but I wasn't telling the truth.
          "I know you're not." He whispered then looked down at the syringe once again. I stared at it then watched as it went up and touched the surface of my forearm, breaking through the skin quickly. It was like a needle going through silk, hard but fast once it gets through the surface. I felt the thick liquid going into my arm then looked up at him.
         He took it out and looked back at me, leaning forwards and pressed a gentle kiss against my forehead. I would've slapped him or kicked him if I wasn't tied down. But it felt nice not being in control.
Maybe I should be tied down more often with men I don't know how I feel about to be more certain.
"I love you." He whispered as he stepped back, that's when my head throbbed for a brief moment, my eyes filling with tears. Quick. I was leaking to death.
I sobbed weakly then looked down, shutting my eyes tightly as I fought against the ropes violently, I was so done with life. I was done with him. He betrayed me, I was going to die and I was going to be killed in the most aggressive way possible.
Then the tears streamed down my cheeks.