Thoughts and Rambles

Sometimes when I miss you, I cry...

             I'm pretty sure it's only me, you're such a lovely person and you have such lovely acquaintances (note sarcasm). I know you don't miss me nearly as much as I miss you, and that hurts. I know that you can go a day without me and I barely survive 8 hours without you. I feel so weak, so distraught, and I can't handle that. But the thing is, I don't want to lose you anymore. I've had my feel of that once and I'm not ready to go through that ever again. I'm crying right now. I shouldn't be, but I am. Are you feeling this or is she there in place of me. Who am I to say anything like that though, you should have heard how much regret was in that laugh just now. I've looked to others for comfort in hopes that it would help me, which it didn't, if anything it's only made things worse, and I know that once I tell you all I'll do is hurt you. I have to tell you though. I have to. I'm a jealous, needy, insecure, fucking freak (Cred. Ronnie Radke) I can't help that, it's just who I am, I wish it wasn't. I'd have a lot more faith that this would all work out if I wasn't so, wasn't so me .