Messages To Joe | J.S

[0023]

Sunday October 3rd 2015:
{Morning}
1:03 - Joe:
Hey Amber, how are you?

1:34 - Amber:
Not good, Joe, if you must know

1:36 - Joe:
I knew you didn't sound alright yesterday, but I didn't want to push you, do you wish to share?

You don't have to, I understand x

1:37 - Amber:
Joe I want to tell you, I do, but I know all your going to do is blame yourself

1:40 - Joe:
Your just getting me worried, please just tell me!

1:41 - Amber:
Promise me you won't say it's your fault

1:45 - Joe:
I promise

1:48 - Amber:
Basically, Kim told Sam about the whole thing - with you and what we talk about from all she saw - and he lashed out at me, thinking we were more than we are. And we had a huge fight and he stormed out and I told him he didn't accept me for who I was, like a weird ass person and yeah...I'm pretty sure we broke up.

1:52 - Joe:
Oh my gosh Amber I'm so sorry! I knew he wouldn't like it, I'm so sorry and I'm not going to say it's my fault but it's quite clear

Do you WANT to break up with him though?

1:53 - Amber:
No of course not, but I'm not prepared to end our friendship for love or extreme like

1:56 - Joe:
But you love him Amber, and if you love someone you should tell them because one day, they might not be around. Trust me, I know the feeling

1:57 - Amber:
But again, I'm NOT prepared to loose this friendship

1:59 - Joe:
Well, things will change in life you know and this may be one of them, you can tell him to read these conversations and he can see there's no love here, just friendship. I don't want to shit stir but have you ever known who he picks up his phone for when your watching a movie because it buzzes? Does he ever go 'oh that was just Tim'?

2:03 - Amber:
I know, but I can't go around accusing him of that, it's just hypocritical

2:05 - Joe:
NO he's the hypocrite!

2:07 - Amber:
But we don't know that, he may be totally innocent and it's all my fault !

2:10 - Joe:
Okay, look I don't blame myself of this - much - but I'm not going to make this any easier or harder for you but why don't you just take a break from talking to me, just so give yourself time to think about it all and what you want to stay the same and what you want to make change in your life. Okay? But whenever you fell stressed or worried you have to remember I WILL be here for you even just to rant to. And anyway, I'll always be in my videos for you to watch so it's not like we won't have any contact x

2:13 - Amber:
I will take a break Joe, thank you and I am sorry but with my work and revision as well as my friendship with Kim and obviously now with Sam it's a lot and perhaps a break from my phone all together would do me some good, thank you x

And also, congrats on 3,000 ! It came about so quickly ! Wait until all the collabs go up, then it'll go to 10,000 I bet you any money

2:16 - Joe:
Thank you, but can I just ask before you go, do they know about me as such as YouTube and Zoë?

2:18 - Amber:
No, they don't. I told you I would've preferred to keep you to myself and I'll do what I can to keep the most of it private, especially that bit because then, they'll want me talking to you just cause of that, and I don't want that because it's not fair on me or you

Now I should go, because I need to think about everything and get some sleep before the morning, thank you Joe and I'll let you know how things progress when and where they do xx

2:19 - Joe:
I promise you, I'm 100% going to message you something to make you smile everyday from now on, you don't need to reply but PLEASE do read it, good luck Ambs x

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I hope you read between the lines of this chapter, it was a little hard but a few things gave it away.

So basically, in going to through a lot of rubbish at school with friends and thing and I'm feeling super depressed because of it so I'm spending so much time just thinking and that means no phone and things but I have written this and I do try to write at school a lot of stuff but please don't hate me as your all so supportive with this story 💛