IN WHICH: I get trampled, asked out, and slapped. In that order.

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Dawn_Child_of_Helios

Next question: Most embarrassing date?

Oh, boy.

I'm not sure if this counts as a date, but it was just the two of us, so I'm going to go with it.

We were just walking in the woods, talking, when suddenly Nico stops and says, "There's someone I'd like you to meet."

Cue confusion.

He continues: "Remember Quintus? Well, he had a pet hellhound named Mrs. O'Leary-"

This is where I'd like to interrupt the story and explain something. 

Beckendorf and I were really good friends. When Percy Jackson went on one of his little quests to save the world, Beckendorf was put in charge of Mrs. O'Leary. As a result, I spent quite a bit of time with her. On with the story.

"- and I think you'd really like her."

I tried to explain that I had already met Mrs. O'Leary, but I think he didn't hear me, because he whistled. 

About thirty seconds later, a massive patch of darkness starts hurtling towards us much too quickly. Nico ran to greet her and got a surprise bath. I, on the other hand, hung back.

Time for more explanations.

I'm a cat person. So much so that people have told me I even act like a cat sometimes, and I believe them. One of the problems about being a cat person, at least for me, is that I am highly uncomfortable around dogs. Or hellhounds. Or canines in general.

Okay hi this is Emma, Will's little sister, a.k.a. em-musical_ermine.  Will is beating around the bush here because he's embarrassed, but I'll tell you what he's trying to say: He's afraid of dogs.

Well then. Thank you, Emma, for stating that. Yes, I am afraid of dogs. They're not as bad as snakes, though. Let's keep going.

Satisfied with her enthusiastic greeting for Nico, Mrs. O'Leary turned towards me. I started backing away, muttering "Oh, gods. Oh, my gods," under my breath. 

The look on her face would have been interpreted as 'happy' by dog people, but all I saw were teeth. And then she pounced.

Now, Mrs. O'Leary is not a small dog. She's not even the size of a Great Dane. No, she's the size of a car, and weighs around as much. So having her jump on your chest, knocking the wind out of you, and then stand there drooling on your face is not what you'd call a pleasant experience for me. I probably would've screamed if my lungs weren't being crushed.

After what felt like eternity, Mrs. O'Leary got off of me, and I struggled to my feet. Nico, ever the caring boyfriend, was standing off to one side laughing his head off. He whistled for Mrs. O'Leary and the two started running around in the forest.

I was leaning against a tree, trying to catch my breath, when this nymph walks up to me. To this day, I still don't know who she is. She put her hand on my shoulder and smiled at me. "Hey handsome. How about a date?"

Now, I don't know about you guys, but I'm not used to being spontaneously asked out by a tree, so I just stood there confused. 

She batted her eyelashes at me. (Why do girls do that? It's weird. Then again, I'm gay, so I'm not the best judge.) "Well?"

"I-uh-"

Nico walked over. "What's going on?"

"Who is this?" the nymph asked.

"I'm his boyfriend. Who are you?"

"You- you-" the nymph stuttered, looking back and forth between us. "Ugh!" She turned, slapped me, and stormed off.

Nico snickered. "Who was that?"

"I- don't know." I managed. "She just randomly came up and asked me out."

This was apparently very funny, because Nico started laughing. Again.

"It's not funny!" I complained.

"It so is," he responded, still laughing.

We walked back to camp, him laughing at me and me telling him it wasn't funny the whole way.


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