Fifty Shades Of Grey: My Years With Elena #Explicit [Fifty Shades] #fanfic

CHAPTER TWO

I hear the patio doors sliding open behind me and the click of heels on the concrete floor.
FUCK! She's coming out and I'm not wearing my t-shirt! I can't let her see me like this...
...see my deformed body...
I frantically grab my t-shirt again and try to put it on, but it's got all warped from where I used it to wipe my sweat and it's half turned inside out. I just manage to slide it on my arms as she reaches me.
"I thought you'd like a nice cold lemonade, Christian." She says in a breathy voice that goes straight to my groin. "You seem to be working up quite a sweat," she almost purrs, as her clear blue eyes look me up and down.
FUCK! Did she just check me out?
She is directly opposite me, dressed in tight black pants that stop just below her knees, showing off her shapely legs, black heeled sandals and a tight black vest that accentuates her ample cleavage. She has shiny blonde hair, scraped into a high pony-tail and it glints in the sun. She sure is one sexy package...
"Yeah, that'll be from the damn sun and all the shit you need moving!"
Why the FUCK did I just say that? I wanted to sound witty and amusing and I've only ended up sounding like a wise-ass!
I hurriedly try to apologise before she either hurls the lemonade over me, throws me out, or both. But I am stopped in my tracks by what follows next...
THWACK!
My face spins painfully to the side as she quickly slaps me hard across the cheek, totally blindsiding me.
AHH! What the Fu...
No one has ever slapped me across the face before. I've been hit, beaten to a pulp by that bastard pimp, but never slapped - and certainly never by a woman. I am taken totally by surprise. My instinct is to put my hands up to defend myself, but they are still trapped in my Goddamn t-shirt. What happens next surprises me even more...
Before my head has returned back to its original position, Mrs. Lincoln grabs me on either side of my jaw and plunges her lips hard onto mine.
HOLY SHIT!
I've never been kissed before and I certainly never imagined my first kiss to be with a hot, older, married woman. Before my brain can even register what she's doing, she abruptly stops.
Then slaps me again!
HARDER!
A mixture of anger and desire surge through me and I open my mouth to protest, but her mouth is quickly on mine again and this time her tongue dives between my teeth as she holds my head firmly in place.
HOLY. FUCKING. SHIT.
A minute ago I'd never been slapped or kissed. Now I have been slapped hard in the face twice and I'm being hungrily French kissed by an insanely hot, older woman!
...And my hands are still trapped in my fucking t-shirt! I want to reach up and at least grab her amazing tits, but she feels me move and seems to sense what I want to do. She pulls off immediately.
"Enjoy your lemonade, Christian. I've left the pitcher on the patio table. Just help yourself."
And with that she saunters off, her heels clicking sexily on the concrete as I watch her peachy ass wiggle against her tight pants. She slips back inside the house and locks the patio doors, without so much as looking back at me.
WHAT. THE. ACTUAL. FUCK?
Did that really just happen? I stand there in the blistering heat, gaping at the patio doors, where she has now disappeared from view. Did I just dream that?
Well if I did, how did I get a glass of lemonade, a stinging cheek and one of the hardest erections I've ever had in my entire life?