Feelings Awry(A Liam Payne novel)

Chapter 1

{EDITED, Please Point Out any Further Issues.}

"Anya! Let's go! Our front row won't be there anymore if we're late!" My best friend Julia screamed. We were nineteen, and getting ready for the first ever One Direction concert in our town. I hurried out the house to her car, deciding I wouldn't wrap my wrists in my open fingered leather gloves tonight since I was in a flowey long sleeved top.

"Let's go!" I screamed, jumping into the passenger side. Julia and I had stayed outside the ticket booth for three days until the tickets were released, we were the first one's to buy tickets, and they were supposedly the best in the venue, other than the VIP's of course.

I clicked in my seatbelt, then wrested my arms in my lap, palms up. "Anya, what the hell are on your arms?" Julia asked, I guess they aren't as covered as I'd thought, oh well. I kind of regret not telling her, but for now my best friend doesn't even know much about me.

"Uhm nothing, I guess Marbles just scratched me and I didn't notice." I sighed, letting the lie slip through my lips, Marbles is my beloved kitten.

"That's a little precise for a tiny kitten like Marbles." She laughed, over looking my lie. I looked at the clock, we would be there by five PM, two and a half hours before One Direction went on stage. They were doing a full three hour concert, and Julia and I brought four cameras and our phones, we originally had plenty of pictures and videos on all of them, but we either deleted them, or uploaded them to our computers so that we could get the entire three hours on tape.

When we were there, people were already milling about the stadium, luckily, we brought our bank cards, so we didn't have to limit ourselves too hugely on what we bought. So we bought the biggest water bottles we could, knowing how dry our throats would feel in the front. Then we walked in, and found our way to the dead centre of the front row, setting our stuff down, turning off our phones for the time being, and pulling out the first camera we'd use from our bags.

Before I could turn off my phone, it flashed, saying I had an unread text. 'Hey little shit, you better not be at the gay fag concert that's going on tonight, if you are, expect a punishment, I told you not to go out.' I cringed reading the text, it was my dad, another thing my best friend doesn't know about.

The boys came out say hello to some of the fans that were already here, to help make all the waiting we'd be doing for the next little bit before the concert worth while. I looked around, there were literally only three other girls in here, and they sat right next to us. They sat down on the edge of the stage, right in front of us.

"Hi girls." They said in unison. I died.

A shiver ran through my back as I looked at Julia, do they do this at every venue?

"Hi!" The five of us squeal.

"So, excited for later?" Hazzy bear asks.

We all just nodded our heads huge smiles on our faces.

"Is this all your first concert?" Nialler wondered.

"No, we've been to two others." The three girls said. Seriously? Why go to more than one of a band? When the tickets you buy could go to people who've never been before.

"Its our first," Julia and I told them.

They chatted with us until more people started to flood the seats, they were hilarious, and friendlier than we originally thought.

When they finally started the concert, there was fog everywhere, and they started to sing Live While We're Young, all we could see was the band, until the boys' distorted silhouettes showed up.

Half way through the concert during kiss you, Liam walks up, taking the camera in my hand, and walked around the stage. When he handed it back, I jumped, seeing slash marks all along his wrists, what? Oh no! He had a weird look on his face as well, had he seen mine as I'd seen his? I was freaking out. I saw Liam walk over to Paul the security guard, and say something to him, pointing over at me, but I pretended not to notice, filming Louis on Harry's back singing the chorus.

After the concert was over, Julia and I waited for everyone to be already on their way before we left, and I got back to my horrible life in my parent's basement. Just as we turned to walk away, Paul came up to me.

"Hi, Liam would like to see you." He states, opening the barricade slightly to let me through. What the hell was happening? I looked over to Julia, "she can come to."

We passed through, and waited for Paul to walk, and we followed him backstage to a dressing room with the boys names on it. Paul knocked, "Liam, I have her."

Liam poked his head out, then came out the door in only his sweats. I inwardly swooned. "Hello love, what might your name be?" He asked, pulling me a little farther down the hall.

"Um, Anya." I squeaked.

He nodded, a frown suddenly embedding his face. "Anya, when I returned your camera to you, I saw something on your arms, it stayed in my head the whole concert. Please, may I see them?" He asked.

I glared up at him, "I won't show you what you've appeared to hide from the fans."

He looked taken aback. "W-what? How did you, how did you see?"

"I know what to look for smart boy. How have you hid these since the X Factor?"

"Wait, what? How do you know how long I've been doing this?"

"You can tell by what the scars look like." I held up one of my arms, pulling back the semi-see-through sleeve to my elbow. I pointed to a white line that circled the top of my forearm, it was thin, and slightly wrinkled. "This one, you can tell, is from at the most two months ago, because it is still really white, and only slightly wrinkled."

He held out his hands, asking me to put my arms in them, so he could see. "Why would you do this to yourself? I hate to see my fans like this."

"And you must hate not having people recognize what you go through right?" I questions softly.

He looked at me incredulously. "The-that's exactly it." he shook his head. "How do you know that?"

"Not even my best friend knows about my cuts, or the rest of my life inside the house anyway." I shrugged, I grabbed his arm, looking for a specific scar. There were a whole lot that were looking like they were made at the same time. "These were made three months ago when you and Danielle completely broke up right?"

He gave a short nod. "Listen, I know you don't do this for fans, ever, but if you ever need to talk about it, like vent yourself to someone, I'm always on my phone." I tell him.

"So, you'd give me your number, so that I could metaphorically cry on your shoulder about my problems?" He asked.

"Exactly." I smiled at him.

"What about you though? Don't you need someone?" He asked, his voice heavily laced with worry.

"Technically I do, but I don't want to put anything on your shoulders. But you can drop anything on me." I tell him.

He looks like he's deep in thought for a long moment, then he hands me his phone, already on the contacts page, I typed in my name, and number, but next to my name, I put 'the stress relieving service ;)'

"Thank you." He says quietly. My phone suddenly beeped, since Liam was now looking at his phone, I thought it was him, sending his number into my phone. but when I opened the text, I saw it was from dad. 'Where the fuck are you, you little shit? If your not home within half an hour, you won't be able to go out again! But we'll force you to.' What in the world does my father mean by that?

My face went white, and I ran for Julia, "babe, I have to get home!"

"Oh, curfew right?" She asked, which is what I'd told her earlier. I nodded.

"Bye Liam!" I yelled as we ran away, and I cried out silently that god would keep any harm from me.