I miss You

chapter 19

Diane
Been going to these group sessions for a week. It's ought I guess. I don't have anything to say. Dr hunter she cool I guess bit there a guy Mr. Keel. He's not a doc but a counselor of some sort. I don't speak to him cuz the way my temper set up I'll and. He likes to push peoples buttons.

He always tries to get me to talk I just look at his ass. IDK if it's because I really can't stand his demeanor or because his gaze makes me feel uncomfortable. Morsea picked me up cuz mom was at work as always and Danny, hell who really knows.

"How was it? "
"boring asf"

I mean it was and ion have alot to say to him. I feel like I've lost me and I. The process I'm loving everyone around me. I haven't cried so they claim I haven't accepted it dealt with whatever is eating me alive. They really have no idea.

When I looked up we were at Cross Lake. We always come here to watch the lake and think. This is place that's super heavy. So it must be something going on with Sea for us to be here.

"why we here? "
"Dee, talk to me. You sitting me out. And that shit not gone fly. I love you I'm here for you and you can shit the whole damn world out but it won't be me."

I didn't know what to say. He's right. What kind of friend am I, I'm horrible. I haven't talked to Lommie like talking about.

"I'm sorry Sea. You know I love you, and yes I'm foul. It's just alot going on and I can't talk about it yet. I know that's hard to hear because we talk about everything but just believe me."

Morsea
I listened to everything she said is must be deep if she's not strong enough to talk bout it yet. I watched as tears just began to roll down her face. Her eyes were close as if she was trying to forget a horrible nightmare.

"Dee, I'm here and when you ready to talk I'm here. Jf you need safety you know where my house is. It's me love. Just remember that."
"thanks love"

We drove back home and when we pulled up the one and only Lonnie was parked in front of the house.

"you gone be alright bae? "

I don't know why I get a bad vibe off old boy. But if he want the works he can get it.

"yeah bar, I'll call or text you later"
"OK, love you"
"love you"

She got out the car and walked to the door with him following he looked at me back out before he followed her in the house.

Lommie
See I try and train this. Itch. She got me fucked up. I know she been going to counseling or some shit and I haven't heard from on her much. Glad I got my hoes or things for her would be alot worse. She keep trying me she gone learn.

"bae, wth you with that nigga"
"why are we talking about this again. And if you must know he picked me up cuz mama at work and Danny is God knows where and I needed a ride home."

I wanted to slap her down right there. She gone learn not to fucking okay with me.

"you could have called me"
"well I didnt"

See right there. I had to stop myself from grabbing her by her throat and slinging her lil ass across the room.

"you know what. I see you feel some type of way and you trying my patience, so ima bounce and when I hit you up later you better answer"

Before she could reply I walked out the house headed to Lash house one of the homes he got a few hoes over there. When I pull up I see Danny car. I SMH at the nigga. I walk in grab the blunt that's in rotation and in no time a hoe is on her knees give g me the works. Damn that mouff do great things.

(next day)

Diane
School is almost over thank God. No sessions today. But I have my journal to write in. I find myself writing to my brother alot. Well brothers. Telling Mitchell how much I miss him and how I'm no longer protected because he's not here. I try not to be mad at him and hate him because it's not his fault his time was up. Bit I'm upset because he was pose to always protect me.

I hugged my boys, yep Moses included as they went to football practice. I saw Danny we spoke and I kept it moving. His looks are becoming more and creepier. I thought I would be free of him but it seems the beast is rising again.

As I was walking g to the bus to my surprise Lommie was walking with me. We got on the bus and he sat by me. I just looked out the window. Thinking. I was lost in my thoughts until I felt a pinch. I turned my head to see Lommie looking in my face.

So me being me I pinched his ass back. It pissed him off because his homeboys laughed.

"don't try me Dee"
"well then keep your hands off me"

With that he hit my leg again with his fist and I hit his ass back. Then he hit my arm. When I tell you that shit hurt, hell yeah it hurt. So with all my might I hit him back and that sent him one the edge. He had a evil grin on his face and said I'll get you when we get off the bus.

"dude you hit me. You don't expect me not to hit you back"
"OK keep testing me, ima show you"

We pulled up to my bus stop and his ass got off with me. Every out was laughing I didn't K kw what we funny.

"Lommie, we over. I know you cheat. I'm not giving it up to you so hey in done."

The bus driver off and for some reason I feel my heart drop and my anxiety kick in full blast.

"Bitch you got me fucked up. It's over when I say and and helm yeah I cheat u less you gone suck my sick and give me my pussy."
"you don't own me goodbye"

With that he jerked my arm and in one swift movement he punched me in my jaw. It didn't really hurt, I think because I was trying to process what was going on and then he hit me again. With this lick I had quick darkness. As if my eye closed but they never did. Before I could react he hit me again.

It must have pissed him off that I didnt fall because the glove he had on he took off and hit me again. For some reason that one I felt. He was too strong to fight back. The two girls whom I thought were cool that got off with us, didn't even help me. By this point my jaw is throbbing. He was about to hit me again when they finally said something.

"ought Lom that's enough. You got her"

How the duck could they stand they and say some shit like that. I didn't even cry. I was mad. I wanted to kill him.

He walked off laughing while these bitches talked about what they would have done if it was them..........

"y'all didn't even help me. Don't talk shut now"

By this point I'm shaking I'm so angry. I run home. Thank God my mama her with her friend from work. My okay auntie. Mama saw my face and said

WHAT THE LIVING FUCK!! .....
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Hello my beautiful butterflies. How are y'all. I know this like a long chapy the second part of it I'm typing right now.

So what y'all thinking? Lommie true colors have surfaced.

Why type of nigga is bold enough to admit he cheats, SMH.

the chicks that ain't do shit. I tell y'all friends ain't friends.

Well let me go type the next one. Stay tuned. Love you all.

Y'all know the drill. Enjoy, vote, comment, and share. Muah