Desire {Christian Delgrosso Fanfiction}

H.

"So, look, umm" Christian was chewing his words and I was impatiently biting the inside of my cheek, waiting to hear the actual words he wanted to say. "The thing is...uh.." He scratched his head for a second, avoiding to make eye contact with me. I was staring at him like a fool, anxiously and constantly biting the inside of my cheek and my lips too. "I think...I mean, I know, not just think that..." Christian started mumbling again, still not reaching the point and I was becoming more impatient as seconds went by.

"Oh, say it already!" I practically yelled at him and he widened his eyes, looking at me like he wasn't expecting this and he probably wasn't. "I'm sorry, go on.." I sighed and mumbled, setting my hands between my thighs.

"(Y/N) I like you." Christian confessed after all this mumbling he was doing and all the anxiety I suffered.

"Date me." The words slipped my mouth and once I heard my own voice and realised what I had actually said, I widened my eyes and covered my mouth as if I was shocked. And of course I was! Did I just say date me to the person who insisted to hate me all this time? But then again, he said he likes me. Wait, wait. What did he mean by I like you? Does he like me enough to simply hang out with me or does he like me like he has a crush on me? Why did I open my mouth without even thinking?

"That's what I wanna do." Christian nodded and for the first time after a while, he made a long lasting eye contact with me.

"What?" I was more than just surprised by his words but I was brought down when I thought that he could be kidding again like he did the other day, back in Justin's house.

"What?" He looked at me like he didn't understand why would I question that. "You said date me and I said that that's what I wanna do."

Is he serious? Oh my God, is this really happening? Okay, but seriously now, I don't know what to say to that. How should I respond..?

"Christian, if this is some weird joke of yours, you better stop it now because it's not funny. Not at all." I said in a really serious tone as if it was a matter of life and death.

"I'm not joking, (Y/N). Honestly, after all this time of hating you, I have come to the realisation that I have a crush on you. And a massive one." Christian sounded more serious than ever and although I should be convinced by now, I still didn't quite believe him.

"Right, uh, Christian, I want to believe you but it's not my fault that I think that it's a prank and I'll end up disappointed." I mumbled, shrugging my shoulders.

Christian didn't waste time with more chit-chat. Instead, he pulled me closer to him by wrapping his arm around my waist and kissed me. The kiss was passionate enough for me to entirely believe him now. He didn't stop at one kiss. He kissed me again and again and I was enjoying it too much, at some point I doubted if this scene was even real.

"Believe me now?" Christian smiled at me and I blushed. Yes, I actually blushed!

"I do." I nodded my head while a soft smile was forming on my lips.

"I really want to date you." Christian smiled at me again. "Oh, lucky you because the feeling is mutual." I grinned, making him chuckle.

"It might sound like a bad idea, but I'm curious to find out why you were hating on me..." I decided it was time to ask that because I honestly wanted to know. I knew that he disliked my clothes, my makeup, the fact that I was smoking but why that much and why specifically me?

"Okay, it's going to sound crazy and you'll probably think I'm not that much of a sane human being but I all this time, I admired you. I admired how you looked so alternative, so independent and so modern. You look like those really artsy people, creativity describes you." Christian looked at me, biting his lips anxiously as he was watching my face making different grimaces.

"And how did that lead you to hate me?" I said, not quite understanding him.

"I guess I was jealous..." He shrugged and I burst into laughter. He obviously couldn't be serious. Why would anyone be jealous of me?

"(Y/N), it's not even funny. I was jealous that you weren't...mine." Christian stated and I stopped laughing. I stood there staring at him blankly, I was left with no words to reply to that.

"But now things took a different turn and I'm happy about it." Christian said smiling at me while I was still standing and staring.

I was genuinely happy about it too but now, I couldn't even find the words to explain how I felt. I couldn't manage to even act normal. It was one of those moments when my mind was filled with thoughts coming and going, running inside my head. I was feeling frozen in time as my anxiety was hitting me. My heart beats raised and my mind had stopped working properly; the only thing inside it was my stupid demons not leaving me alone. Why on earth was I even getting anxious now? But I couldn't decide when I would feel like that, it comes in waves and I can't control that.