The Day I Found True Love

Chapter 5: Awkward Silence

We stood on my front porch staring at each other...I didn't know what to do, I didn't mean to almost kiss her. I hope she doesn't leave me friendless, I really hate myself for what happened.

I diverted my eyes from Sophie and unlocked the door, her arm was no longer around my shoulder it just laid lazily by her side. We walked into the house in complete silence, no one said a word not even a whisper.

I was seriously shit scared right now, she was acting really distant and it seemed like she was ignoring me. I went and got us both two glasses of water, I left hers on the kitchen counter top while I went and searched for a movie to watch to try and get rid of this deafening silence.

I put some random animation movie on, because I loved animated movies. I heard Sophie walking toward the lounge and I saw her sit down on the couch that was situated on the right off the room, it felt like she's trying g to stay as far away from me as possible, I was completely shattered on the inside...I could feel the tears threatening to spill from my eyes, but I managed to will them back down.

The movie was about half way when I couldn't take it anymore I just got up and left the room I couldn't stand the tension that wasn't getting resolved. I heard footsteps behind me as Sophie entered my room, I didn't want to look at her because she would see how weak I am. "I'm sorry, I don't know what happened out there on the porch and I'm going to take full responsibility." Her words didn't make sense to me. Why was she taking responsibility it wasn't even her fault.

"It wasn't your fault, It was just an accident... " although I wish it wasn't. I felt the side of my bed dip in as she sat down. I still didn't want to turn around because if I did I knew all the tears would fall from my eyes. She got up and I thought she was leaving the room, but the footsteps were coming closer to me and not further.

I felt Sophie put an arm around my should and I thought to myself oh no not again, but she didn't just sit next to me she engulfed me in a nice warm hug. It was one off those hugs that could make all your problems and fears disappear.

I let a tear fall by accident and Sophie noticed and pulled away. "Why are you crying" she whisperd. I tried not too look into her eyes because she was holding my face between her hands," I'm just scared of loosing you, because you are the only real friend I've had in a really long time." I had no idea how I managed to say that whole sentence because I was feeling really insecure right now.

"I promise I will never leave you, no matter how tough things might be and what we personally go through I promise to always be here for you." I couldn't believe what I was hearing...maybe she was just saying that to make me feel better.

Well I didn't really care at that moment because what she said made me all warm and fuzzy on the inside. We headed back to the lounge to start the movie from beginning, because nether of us were paying attention. This time Sophie and I sat right next to each other we even got a blanket just for fun.

I was lying down on Sophie's lap while she played with my hair and watched the movie, I wouldn't know when she was more focused on a scene in the movie because her fingers wouldn't stop moving through my hair in a soothing motion. She was making me sleepy because it felt really good just lying down and relaxing.

I fell asleep on Sophie...but when I woke up she was gone...I hope she is just in the bathroom or something. I suddenly heard my phone vibrate, it was Sophie. She was at home but what time is it? Oh my god it was seven already. I got up and went to check if my mom was home because she's usually back by 6 but there's were no other signs off life in my house.

Natalia: hi, sorry I fell asleep on you. What time did you get home?

Sophie: its not problem, I got home at 5. Did you see the news...?

Natalia: no why

Sophie: what car does your mom drive

Natalia: a white merc why? Sophie tell me what's going on what's with all the questions?

Sophie: I think your mom might have been involved in an accident...I'm so sorry, they taking her hospital now I don't know which one

Natalia: is this some kind of sick joke. Please don't joke with stuff like this especially when it comes to my mom

Sophie: Natalia I'm not... I'm so sorry...I didn't mean to bring it upon you this way, you deserve to know...

I didn't bother to reply because I was crushed....she can't just say things like that, I only have my mom...I can't loose her as well...I'll become an orphan. I rushed to my TV and put the news on and all the tears left my eyes in a rush as my moms picture appeared on the screen.

She wasn't lying...but...but...this isn't right why does everyone keep leaving me...I practically have no one left already. I know she's going to be okay, I need to think positive... This can't be happening, its probably just a really bad dream. I pinched myself three times and nothing happened I just broke down I couldn't take this shit anymore.

I hated everything and everyone. Why does it have to be my mom of all people in the whole damn world it has to be the one person who I have left in my life who's a constant.
I still couldn't fathom that my own mother was in hospital and I could do nothing about it, except just sit here and wait for her to come back to me...I'm all alone..in this cruel world...