Finding Sophia (The Walking Dead Fanfiction)

Eighteen: Go Back

I don't know what happened to my family. They were in Hawaii, on some family reunion whilst I lived my life in Georgia. I actually hadn't been doing to bad. I had a boyfriend, I had a 'job' and we had a life.

We tried a few times to have kids, not going to lie. I mean, we just lived for four years together in the same apartment, not to mention seeing one another for five years before that. Sex was inevitable, and I really didn't mind. I didn't really want kids, but he did. He was Mexican and wanted this big Catholic family, even though his dad was a Catholic priest who was never in his life. I was Catholic too, but children never really appealed to me, especially the ones that grow inside you for 8-9 months. Caesar's mom raised him right no matter what, and he was a good man. His heart was in the right place and he loved everyone around him. He forgave...a lot.

The whole kids thing didn't work out, because we found out I couldn't. It was our umpteenth time trying before they finally declared it true. That was the first time in a long time I'd cried. I barely wanted a child, and here I was crying over it like a normal woman in my position would.

And then, a few months later, I was pregnant. It was literally a miracle. I carried that child for six months before I miscarried. We'd found out that it was a little girl. Thousands upon thousands of little boy names and we had one name for a girl. Rosa Maria Martinez, and she was dead. Caesar didn't blame me though, like I'd blamed myself. I could've done something to have that baby.

That was year two of us living together, but I still didn't run away. I stopped talking for a while and I was fired from my job at the cafe. I didn't care. I was earning more money for my signs anyway. But it hurt. I had a baby, I was going to be a mother, and it fell apart.

Caesar was hurt too, but he just wanted to see me smile again. He wanted me again. He hugged me and loved me when I pushed him away. I didn't have anywhere to go, and though I considered leaving, I didn't.

My whole family decided to go on some big family reunion in Hawaii, and I was invited, it was tempting. Rebecca and Michael even called a few times. I didn't go.

Then the apocalypse started. We got out of Atlanta despite everyone else, and we were some of the firsts in Woodbury. We helped build the wall and everything. The Governor...he helped ruin my life, pushing me away.

I still don't regret leaving. I do regret leaving my family. I didn't get to say goodbye. Everyone else, they were able to see their loved ones. Even though I had the option to go with them, I let her go to Hawaii. Maybe their still alive because they're on that island, or maybe their geeks or dead or...

I didn't have them to lose.

I had to go back. Back to the prison. Back to Sophia. Back to everything I left behind.