Broken Defender

Chapter Seventeen ~ Bottled Anger

As planned, we walked to school together. Harry's arm hooked possessively around my neck as we made our hike down the boring street toward our location. It was overcast today. The normally darkened October sky was hooded even more so by a thick shadowing cluster of gray clouds. Would it rain? I hope it does. I love the dreary autumn rain... it's comforting, relaxing. "You look very pretty today." Harry confided, pressing his lips to the shell of my ear as the words fell from his mouth in a sugary escape. I could already feel an oncoming blush as he pulled me close. His warm lips pressed proudly against my cheekbone as we made our way onto the campus grounds. How would this work? I'd never had a boyfriend before, so I wasn't exactly sure what to expect of a day at school with one. I guess it couldn't be all that eventful... after all we have exactly zero classes together. Would people notice? Would people begin to take conscious note of our obvious ties to one another? Will they even care? I know I wouldn't if I were them. I didn't pay much attention to the wiles of lovey-dovey classmates around me. I knew of a handful of love affairs and flings only due to my incessant habit of eavesdropping. It's not like I was dying to know the dirt on every one... I just couldn't help listening.

We made our way up the steps. Harry pushed the heavy door opened, allowing our entrance into the loud, and buzzing hallway... and like clockwork, it happened. My eyes met with the curious eyes of an onlooker, our first witness. My gaze broke from theirs almost instantly in embarrassment, only to be met by another inquisitive glance. It was like a domino effect. Eye after on looking eyes met mine in confusion, and curiosity as Harry and I made our slow journey down the cluttered hallway. Why did they care? Why do they care? I'd never gotten so much attention before. And as though I had not already felt like I was suddenly under a microscope, these interested glances in our direction were all too suddenly followed by questioning whispers. I felt vulnerable... targeted almost. I hated this feeling. I hate being seen. All I ever wanted out of high school was to go ignored; hidden behind books, lockers, and lunch trays, whatever I could use to shy myself from public scrutiny or ridicule. It's not that I thought myself freaky... it's that I found life to be far easier when I hid in the sidelines, avoiding drama as best I could. And now that was spoiled. Years of attempting to remain unnoticed by the major populace of my school were now ruined by this moment. I'm sure had Harry been born and raised right here in Cariton Kansas, they would have thought nothing of our union. Classmates wouldn't be curious about us, about what was going on... but Harry was a stranger, an outsider. He held an awe of mystery that no other student; not even the ignored students such as myself, was able to attain. Was I now a topic of gossip? Would my name now be thrown about in daily rumor filled conversations? I hope not. I don't want the attention. I hate attention.

"Baby, you're hurting me." Harry whispered in my ear. His steps slowed. His arm; still wrapped around me neck, loosened a bit as my eyes locked on his hand. I had reached up, subconsciously locking his hand in a death grip. Fingers clutching, nails digging into the flesh of his palm as he bared the discomfort. I dropped my hand to my side, freeing his hand from my iron hold as he returned both fists into his pockets, freeing me also from his grasp. We were standing directly in front of my locker now. As always I found myself fiddling with the lock; quickly clicking through the combination and opening the aged, and squeaking green metal door. I took my bag from my shoulder, opening it quickly and tossing off some of the books that I had taken for the weekend as I had homework. I lightened my load, preparing for History class as Harry stood behind me. "What class do you have first?" I asked, turning on my heels to face him once more as he leaned toward me. "English." He explained, his palm resting against the locker behind me. "And it's across the whole building, so I gotta go." He informed me in disappointment. We can't even walk to class together... that sucks. Harry lifted his free hand. His index finger hooked beneath my chin; thumb brushing slightly at my lower lip. "I'll see ya at lunch then eh?" He asked quietly. His other hand found residence behind my neck, fingers twisting in the knotted loops of my hair.