Dangerous Loving Game-Mikannie{Finished}

We Can Figure It Out Together

Annie's POV:
These fucking idiots. I wish Mikasa had at least visited the other night so I could at least have some sort of reason to wake up in the morning,but of course she had night watch so she didn't have enough time off it to visit me. Fuck. We have extra cleaning duty this morning because Marlo back talked to one of our superiors the other night. What was it about again? Oh yeah, two of the senior Military Police members were giving this elderly couple a hard time because they didn't have enough money to pay their taxes because they spent most of their money on treatment for their son who recently just got brain damage and is apparently brain dead. Marlo, always the "heroic" one,went right outside in the dead of night when it looked one of the soldiers was about to get physical. Of course, no one waits till morning to clear this up, because when its in the middle of the night no one has the energy to deal with everyone.Geniuses I swear. Can't help that I'm grouchy. It looked it was gonna turn into a full-out brawl until Hitch stepped in, good because those soldiers probably would have beaten Marlo to death and I know they would've had no problem doing it. She told the couple that they were being selfish and that they should let their son die in peace instead of holding on to the stupid hope that everything will be fine with him. I guess I could get behind what Hitch was saying to some degree,despite her not meaning it. Hmm,I wonder about that girl sometimes. Hitch seemed sad this morning, not even teasing me or anything like that, despite her somewhat uncaring attitude she clearly doesn't mean it. I wonder if she just does that to protect herself from the world. Wow, I actually care enough to wonder if there's more to Hitch than what I see. That's usually only reserved for Mikasa. These people give me a headache. I wonder what Mikasa would thin---.

"Annie,hurry up and clean those windows, we don't have time to daydream. " Marlo said. *Sigh.* Don't reply Annie he's right. The Military Police is holding their annual Support Group Ball for the survivors of the fall of Wall Maria. Funny how how the government helps now when they didn't even send anybody to help them get out of Wall Maria when it fell. Then when they turned to the government for help or shelter of any kind, the government sends them off to their deaths because in their eyes they were probably a nuisance to society. People who would get in the way of their business and if they let them stick around they would get in the way of getting the things they wanted. That's just how it's always been, the wants of the rich are more important than the needs of the poor. I wonder if I'm this angry because I hate it when the weak are just forced to go along with the flow and are constantly trampled by it, or........is it because Mikasa was one of those people forced to go along with the flow so long ago when she needed help the most.

Hours Later:
"Ugh I can't see Mikasa anywhere and the dance has already started." I quietly mumbled to myself as I search for my girlfriend in this gigantic crowd of people. Now I'm talking to myself again. I don't understand why there are so many people here when only Military Police and survivors of the fall of Wall Maria are supposed to be here. Last time I checked there wasn't a lot of survivors, and if there were most of them had been killed in the "Take back Wall Maria"expedition.
Mikasa, Armin, and Eren made out of the midst of it alive, and after everything those three have been through together they definitely deserve to be here. It feels strange when I say how close those three are out loud, feels like I should've been Mikasa's savior when she was younger, not Eren. Chase away all her fears away and sadness, ensure in her mind that she means so much and that her happiness and security doesn't revolve around someone else feeling happy and secure. She can relax and worry about herself for once, while not turning out like me,uncaring of life, just trying to survive. Survival only gets you so far though and soon I'll have to chose what means more to me, survival or Mikasa. I love you Mikasa, and I don't know how to do this whole relationship thing and I don't want to fuck it up. I don't want you to see the monster inside of me, Mikasa. Please don't look at the monster inside." At that moment the room started to feel a little stuffy and Annie found it hard to breath. Her whole body was trembling and thoughts of what would happen if Mikasa could see her monster raced through her head. 'I have to be the monster here or someone will take advantage of me like this. Calm down Annie!' At that thought Annie started to take deep breaths and it did stop the trembling but also made her eyes watery and her chest hurt. "I can't even control my own body so how can I control the monster inside of me?! I'm sorry that you might have to see me like this Mikasa. You deserve better then a monster who doesn't deserve to be a human with you Mikasa." Annie whispered to herself as tears came out of her eyes. ....."Well,I'm pretty sure we all have our own monsters Annie, we just have to use them the right way. You're not uncaring, you care about me enough to question the way you go through life for me. And you already make me feel safe and secure and I can let my guard down around you. Don't worry about not knowing how a relationship is supposed to go, I'm can admit I'm pretty bad at it too but hey we are still young we can make it up as we go along and hope for the best. We have this for now Annie, I can't hope for anything more or anything less. And you're not a monster. Would a monster care so much about what a girl who is usually only a weapon thinks of them? We deserve each other, I don't think there is anybody on this Earth who can handle and understand us as well as we understand and handle each other. I love you too by the way." A soft voice said to me. I hesitantly open my eyes because I already knew who the voice belongs to. My eyes water slightly as I give her a big kiss on the lips and hug her, I don't wanna let go. She smiles at me and we dance the night away, not caring if anybody was staring. I did notice Eren, Armin, and my squad stop anyone who was looking at us with disgust from approaching us or speaking to us for that matter. But I do think I had to show off my knife a few times and while Mikasa tried to hide it from me, I know she pulled her dress up a few times just to her knees so anybody who looked homophobic coming over to us would see her 3D Maneuver Gear Blades. Not the actual gear itself(though she does keep a pair hidden in my room)just the blades themselves. That night, I felt like I'm floating on a clo-- that might be going to far.Doesn't matter if I can't explain it,love is love.

After the ball and(unfortunately) the cleanup:
"Are you sure you don't want to go back to the Scouting Legion headquarters,Mikasa? It did take you a long time to sleep by yourself, and yeah that was a long time ago but that was because of what happened on this specific date. You might wanna be with Armin or Eren through this because they can understand better than I can." I tell her softly,even as I lay on top of her and start petting her hair and kiss her softly on my bed. Hitch is busy with Marlo or something. Way to go, tell her to go but tempt her to stay. She just quietly shakes her head and....she looks more vulnerable than I've seen her look in a long time. "Weren't you the one that said that you wanted to chase away all my fears and sadnesses." She says quietly as she brings me closer to her. Despite me knowing that now is not the right time, I blush a little bit. Stupid. Eh,she cracks a little smile though, so I did a little good. That's one of the things I love about Mikasa. She wasn't very open with her affections but when she was open she glimmered,she seemed a little younger whenever she was openly sad or happy and healthy, I love when she is able to express the child she never got to be while also not giving all of her emotion to me or anyone else. It's beautiful. It's like reaching for stars you know you can't reach. Part of me likes the disappointment cause I don't deserve that much emotion. Another part of me loves it because that's so Mikasa. Being a part of the flow,but also not being a part of it. "I love you,Mikasa Ackerman,I'll be with you to the end of time if I can help it." Did my voice crack at the end because of all the emotion that was in that statement or because I know I probably won't be with till the end of time because of who I am? the doubt must show on my face because Mikasa kisses me softly and holds me close and tells me to shush. I do. We spend the night lightly touching each other until we fall asleep.
As Annie falls asleep Mikasa can't help but go back to some of the things Annie said. She can't help but get this feeling that her relationship is gonna take a turn for the worst and Annie isn't the woman she thinks she is.