That Boy Is My Monster

Three Words

After Sidney left that night I made sure to let her know that if she needed anything to let me know. I know that's something her boyfriend should be doing but I really had no idea what Billy was up to right now. Oddly enough, he showed up at my doorstep at 11pm sharp. Luckily my parents were away for the weekend, so I had the house to myself. Without even telling him, he somehow knew.

"What do you want?" I asked him.

"To see you."

"That was your excuse last night." I turned away wanting to shut the door.

He ignored me. "I heard you were studying with Sidney tonight."

"Yes, well, we are partners for an assignment," I said sarcastically.

"How's she doing?" he asked looking up.

I let him in and shut the door behind him. It wouldn't be wise for us to be seen talking on my front porch. "She is your girlfriend. Why don't you just ask her yourself?" I walked upstairs and he followed.

"Why are you so crabby?"

"She's a mess, Billy," I turned and shouted at him. "I don't know about you but I feel partly responsible. First, you killed her mother and now Stu, one of her closest friends. Not to mention, he was your best friend, Billy and you seem to be doing just fine. Why won't you tell me what's going on?" I tried to calm down.

"I thought you trusted me."

"I do trust you Billy but after tonight, I feel like I know just as much as Sidney does. You seem to be in control of this little movie of yours and I'm just the dummy along for the ride."

"This is Sidney's fault. What did she do today?"

"Nothing is her fault, Billy. She's broken, Tatum is a mess. I had Sidney in my bedroom, crying, for hours!"

"You aren't strong enough," I could see he was starting to get angry. His face was becoming tense and tight.

"Strong enough for what? For being your dirty little secret? Your girlfriend is Sidney. What am I?"

"You don't trust me."

"I do fucking trust you!" This time I was furious. I could see his eyes open widely and he was staring deeply at me.

"Am I next on your hit list? I thought Stu meant something to you the same way I think I do, but I don't know, I could be dead tomorrow."

"You obviously don't get it, Ashley. You never did."

"Well why don't you explain it to me then?" What did Stu say that night, about Sidney?"

"He never said anything about her."

"The night, you killed him, before you stabbed the shit out of him he asked you 'what about Sidney?' you never replied," I could fear my eyes burning. I felt like I was going to cry.

"You are not who I thought you were."

"Well what did you think I was?"

"I knew this would happen."

"Knew what would happen?" I frowned.

"I guess I just thought you were something different, Ashley. But clearly, you're just like the rest of them." Billy bit his lip and walked quickly down the stairs. I heard my front door slam behind him on his way out.

That night, I missed him. I missed Billy. I missed his hair, his touch, his face, his everything. I felt terrible. I should've waited for him to give me some answers. They were coming soon, right? I was so sick of being kept in the dark though. I didn't know anything. Why was I even doing what I was doing? Just hearing him say those words 'you're not who I thought you were' and 'you're just like the rest of them' were a stab in the chest. I felt like Billy Loomis had just stabbed me. And it hurt. He knows I'm not like them, I'm more like him than I am anyone I've ever met. I see things the same way he does, I understand him for everything he is. He trusted me with all his secrets, all his truths and I bluntly told him I didn't want to be a part of it anymore. I finally found someone that was for me, someone that wouldn't judge me for all my weird quirks and obsessions, someone that wasn't best friend material like Randy, someone that I actually liked and I didn't want it anymore. I think the tipping point was seeing Sidney destroyed. She put those questions in my head. She concerned me and made me questions where my loyalties lie with Billy. She'd never done anything to hurt me, but she's honestly never done anything to help me, so why should I care so much? If anything, she's the one thing stopping me from being fully involved with Billy, publically. There was obviously a reason Billy wanted her mother dead. And something was clearly going on with Sidney too. But what?

The next morning I woke up to a call from Randy. It was so nice to have his usual antics back.

"What are you doing today?"

"Well, you know my parents are away for the weekend so I'm probably just going to sit at home and watch a bunch of movies."

"Mind if I join you? I'm not working all weekend and I have nothing to do." he said.

"Of course!"

We spent most of the day watching some of our favorites. Randy brought along Childs play 1 and 2 and we watched those. It was nice to get back to normality with Randy. This is what we had always done.

"So, what's going on with Billy?" he turned and asked me. "We're alone now, so you can talk."

"Billy? Oh it's nothing," I lied.

"It must be something. You came to school with a love bite. There is definitely something going on," he said in a sarcastic tone.

I laughed at him.

"You really like him, don't you?" he said quietly.

"I don't know, Randy. It's way too complicated."

"What's the complication? You like him and from what it seems, he likes you."

I didn't answer him.

"Sidney?" he asked.

"Yeah, Sidney."

"Why is he going out with her if he's got something going with you?" he asked scrunching up his nose.

"I asked him the same question, but I didn't get a response."

Randy breathed heavily. There was a silence but it wasn't awkward. It was never awkward with Randy.

I heard a knock at the door. Randy and I both looked at each other confused.

"I'll get it," said Randy.

I watched him walk away and listened to him answer the door.

"Billy Loomis, what are you doing here?" is what I heard. Shit.

"Randy Meeks, I could ask the same thing."

I shouldn't really be eavesdropping but I wanted to hear what Billy said to Randy. Randy knew more than he probably should.

"I happen to be Ashley's best friend, her parents are away and we're having a horror marathon," he said in that tone that only he could perfect. "Your turn."

"Is she here?"

I didn't want the conversation to go any further so I interrupted. "I'm here," I came in to the room. "You shouldn't be," I looked at Billy. He looked at me strangely as if I shouldn't be saying anything in front of Randy. "He knows about us, it's fine," I added to reassure him.

"Can we talk?"

"Sure," I said with a fake smile.

"Alone," he said sharply.

Randy looked back and forth between Billy and I while Billy stared deeply at him.

"I...uh... I'll just go continue the movie," he said pointing to the theater room. He then left with an awkward smile.

I walked upstairs and Billy followed.

"I'm sorry," he said. I folded my arms and continued to walk. "I'm sorry," he repeated getting louder. "What more do you want me to say?" I still didn't reply but he followed me into my room. He moved quickly and grabbed me harshly by my arm. "I'm not letting you get away from me," he said squinting his eyes. Billy barely ever raised his voice, even when he was trying to be harsh or angry, he always seemed to be mysterious and alluring.

"Why? Because I know too much?"

He stopped and looked at me for a moment. His eyes suddenly looked softer and he bit his lip. "Because I love you."

The words were strong. They hit me fast. Did Billy Loomis just say he loved me? I never imagined anyone could love me, especially not Billy. My heart was beating fast and I couldn't help but just stare at him while he stared back. His face was inches from mine and he was still holding my arm, tightly. I jolted away and he let go.

"I want you to tell me everything. Tell me what's going on. Tell me about Sidney. Just tell me."