With Love, Silvia. [✔️]

Chapter 25 Memories

My apartment looked exactly like the day I moved out. No furniture was touched, the magazines and books still sat in there place. I was relived to find it this way.

"A yellow couch?" Dad asked looking at our mustard yellow sofa.

"It seemed to just fit...." I muttered and went back into my room.

I soaked it all in. I ran my hand over a framed picture of me and Mom. The picture was us on Halloween night, when I was maybe five or six. I remembered Mom had to work that night and I was going over to the neighboring apartment to trick-or-treat in our complex. Our neighbor was the same age as Mom, and had a husband too. Their son was my age as well, Sammy was his name I think. I remembered how I wanted to dress up like a policewoman that year and Sammy's mom just thought me and Mom looked adorable, since she was in her uniform and I had one that looked like hers. She ran to get her camera and later printed the photo and gave it to us.

I looked at the one next to it, this time it had me, Mom, and Dad. It was the day I was born and Mom was holding me in her arms and Dad was sitting next to her in the hospital bed. I noticed how much he had aged since that day. I guess 15 years and being abandoned in a foreign country would do that to you.

I moved on to my bed which had an array of stuffed animals. My favorite one, Persephone, (I named her after a Greek God, I was a nerdy kid back then!) who was a pink alligator with felt eyelashes stared at me. It was my souvenir from Sea World in Florida, just a month before Dad went off to the military. I stroked my hand over her head and swallowed the massive lump in my throat.

I forced myself out into the living room, to hear sobs. I carefully looked into the living room and saw Dad crying. I had never thought he would do that. He had been through war, shouldn't he be tough?

Not knowing what to do, I slunk back into my room and decided to finish reading the book I had started before I went off to Hollow Springs. I opened it up to where the bookmark said I left off. I noticed that my bookmark wasn't a bookmark at all. It was a note from Mom.

I love you little mouse! Hope your day goes great and I can't wait to see you at home!
xoxo,

Mom

It must have been one of the notes she put in my lunch everyday. I saved them all for sentimental value in a shoebox above my desk. I ran over to the box and read the first one hoping that it would bring me comfort. I read another after another...

I love you Silvia. Good luck on your test today! Remember your integer rules!

Mom

Sorry you're feeling sick today. I'll get you a smoothie when I get off of work. Love you!

Mom

I couldn't take it. I missed her so much. I cried laying in a heap on the floor. I had gone a month being strong, but I knew that I was at my breaking point. All the pain I had hidden for Emma, and Erica, and the whole family's sake came flooding out.

Why did she have to leave me like this? Why did her dumb co workers leave her?

I thought angrily in my head.

Why?

Now the only thing I had left of her were my memories. I wanted Mom more than ever.

I'm not sure how long I stayed there, in a heap. But when I finally calmed down I noticed that the sun had set and it was dark out. The whole house was silent and when I re entered the living room Dad was asleep on the couch. I decided that I had better get some rest too, so I climbed into my bed, not even bothering to bathe or change clothes.

I laid in my bed for an hour and sleep wouldn't come. I lazily walked to the bathroom and dug around in the medicine cabinet looking for some sleeping medication Mom used because she had insomnia. I knew I was allowed to take them as well, but I would have to tell her first. But she wasn't here anymore so I didn't care. Only three pills remained in the container and I took one out. I filled a cup with sink water and swallowed the medicine and went back to my room.

I was asleep in no time.