Why Me?

My Arms...

~Febuary 1, 2016~

      I've always had a problem, cutting was something that started for me at a young age... This of course isn't good because I have scars on my arms, lucky for me though I was too scared as a 10 year old to cut very deep. My scars now have faded and my recent ones have healed over greatly so u can't exactly tell that I've cut .... It's not that I am addicted to it or anything it's that when I have pain on the inside I even it out with pain on the outside, sometimes it feels like I'm incomplete if I don't cut just depending on the stage of depression I'm in. Most of the time I'm afraid to cut because if pippy sees she'll do it too and I don't want to be the cause of anyone's pain..especially hers. But as hard as I try I can never cover it up or keep it from her, I'm really bad at lying. Now u can't exactly see my scars but u can definitely feel them, my arms are very rough..Some people say that cutting is bad and it doesn't help but they don't understand, they haven't felt what I've felt and they don't get that cutting keeps me here, I know I'll regret it when I'm older but for now it's all that's keeping me here...