Free Fall. // l.r.h.

Step 6: Remember All the Memories

I repeatedly banged my head on my math book, accompanied by the sound of Luke's consistent grumbling. "You know what, Matthews? When will we even use trigonometry in real life?"
     This is so not worth rides to school. "It doesn't matter. You just have to pass Mrs. Shephard's class."
"I don't care ab--"
"And I don't care if you don't care."
"Geez, Matthews, you really need to learn how to let me finish." I'd only been in Luke's room for an hour, but it felt more like years. "None of this makes any sense to me."
I rolled my eyes. "Ugh! Do you even know what a triangle is?"
"Oh ha ha, very funny. I know what a triangle is." He got up abruptly, flinging the door open when he reached it.
"Where do you think you're going? This is your house!"
He turned around and gritted his teeth. "I'm leaving."
He stepped out the doorway, and I groaned, flopping back on his bed. "Again?" I shouted after him.
I heard the door slowly creak open as I stared expressionlessly up at the splotchy white ceiling. I felt the downy mattress dip in beside me as Luke sat down softly. "W-what do you mean 'again'?" I remained silent for a few moments, avoiding both his gaze and his question.
"Do you remember third grade?" I murmured, finally sitting up.
He furrowed his brow. "Third grade?"
I smiled slightly. "Yeah. Back when we were just getting used to things. And everything was so fresh and new, and learning was still so fun for us. And it didn't matter if you were a boy or a girl or black or white or..." I sighed. "Or if you had anxiety at such a young age. Or--"
He smirked. "Or me?"
I giggled. "Or a big blonde idiot like you, yes." He laughed, flashing those eyes like shooting stars. "We all just wanted to have a friend." It was silent as memories flooded the room, instilling within us bittersweet moments from the past. "Do you remember the first time we met? Back in third grade?" I asked him.
He smiled down at his feet hanging over the edge of the bed. "Yeah, I remember." He chuckled slightly. "I remember that I thought you were the absolute prettiest little girl I'd ever seen. And I had no idea how to deal with it. So I yanked your pig tail."
"Hard."
"As hard as I could." He laughed.
"What happened freshman year?" I whispered.
I could see by the hazy sadness in his eyes that he knew exactly what I was talking about. Freshman year was the year he stopped looking me in the eyes. The year that best friends became strangers. The year I learned that people don't have to die to walk out of your life.
Luke stared blankly out the large window in front of us. "In freshman year I realized that the absolute prettiest girl I'd ever seen was also the absolute smartest." He bit his lip. "And I was so scared," he whispered.
"Scared of what?"
"Scared that I was holding you back."
I shook my head. "No, Luke, you didn't--"
"You had scholarships and honor rolls, and I had straight C's and football practices. I wanted you to do bigger and better things." He blinked rapidly, trying to hide his sorrow. "I'm sorry." His voice trailed off on the last word he spoke.
Tears stung my eyes. "I thought you hated me."
"Are you kidding? I still feel like that little boy in the back of the classroom who had to pull on your curls just to get your attention. I never meant to leave. I definitely couldn't ever hate you."
"Promise?"
He finally made eye contact with me again. "Harper Jane Matthews, I could never hate you."