Free Fall. // l.r.h.

Step 14: Be Honest

"So how did you explain all that to your teacher?"
"I didn't. I didn't go to class."
It was cloudy enough that the stars didn't paint the sky. It was all black. I'd been telling Luke what happened today with Jace.
Luke shook his head, scratching the back of his neck. "I can't believe he's back. That he did that to you. God, I just wanna--"
"Don't bother. You'll just get yourself another suspension." He just stared down at my hands, placed flat on the quilt we'd laid out. "So I said a prayer today," I said softly. .
He nodded, peacefully plucking the strings of his worn out guitar. "We do need all the help we can get. And I think that's someone who might help you."
I scoffed. "Don't hold your breath."
"What do you mean?"
"Well, number one: By prayer, I mean depressed screaming at God, so..." Luke faked a cough to cover up his suppressed laughter. I felt a grin tugging at the corners of my lips. "And number two: At this point, everyone besides you hates me. Why wouldn't the God I've never spoken to just decide not to hate me?"
"Because He loves you."
"My own twin sister doesn't even love me. And we've shared a room for eighteen years." He bit his lip.
"Hey, don't you worry about Lindsey," Luke murmured. He took my hand into his suddenly, as if he'd finally mustered up all his courage to take it and grab it. His eyes shot to mine, a smile slowly spreading across his face in the dim light of the silver moon. "She'll forgive you in time. Timing is a funny thing, you know."
"Timing is stupid."
"How so?"
"It made my dad decide to come back after seven years."
He sighed. "Geez, Harper, you really need to stop blaming these random things for your dad leaving." He sat up, turning to look at me directly. "Look at you, you're amazing. You're a miracle, and I honestly don't say that enough. And oh, I wish you could see it, but you don't." He looked down with sadness filling the light in his eyes. He softly brushed his lips across my hand, still held tightly in his. Finally, he spoke again. "But you have to see this: it's nothing's fault that your father screwed your life up so bad. It's your dad's fault. That's it. Some people are just plain evil. Evil enough to leave their daughters and their baby and their wife and everyone behind. Evil enough to come back when they're all grown up and take their mother. Some people just suck, okay?"
I sighed. "Life sucks."
"Yeah. Life is kind of the worst."
"And that's sort of beautiful, in a weird way," I said with a mournful smile.
"How so?"
"This series of depressing actions with disastrous results is making me fall apart. But I fell right to you. And I never would've thought that you'd catch me. And look at that, you did."
He smiled, staring down at the ground. "You don't suck."
"I try my best."