My feet rapidly pumped the pedals of my bicycle up and down, propelled by rage and a new story for Luke and Lindsey. I hopped off the seat when I reached our driveway. My feet stopped moving and my heart dropped to the ground as I noticed a hauntingly familiar black motorcycle leaning against the garage door.
I swung the front door open to find Linsey sprawled out just in front of the doorway, hands over her mouth.
"Lindsey?" I dropped to her level in an attempt to make her wide eyes focus on me. "Lindsey, what happened? What's going on?"
She lifted a shaky finger towards the kitchen. "She's here," she whispered.
I stood up, tiptoeing cautiously towards the doorframe of the kitchen. When I entered the room, I fell to the ground.
Mama. There she was. She came back.
"M-Mama?" My voice barely pierced the silence.
"Harper Jane."
I stood completely still as tears slowly rolled down my cheeks.
Mama looked down at her hands. "Look, Harper, I am so--"
"I hate you," I whispered.
She looked up at me with wide eyes. "What?"
"I hate you!" I was screaming now.
"Now, listen--"
"No, you left us!"
"I'm sorry," she murmured.
"Why? Why would you put your family through this?"
She sighed, taking my hand and leading me to the couch. Lindsey was seated beside her. "All I remember is being so happy that your daddy had come home. And he asked me if I wanted a swig from his glass, and of course I said yes." She brushed a tear from her cheek. "And that's the last thing I remember."
Lindsey gasped. "Mama, did he drug you?"
"I don't... I don't know. I woke up two days ago drenched in cold sweat. I didn't know where I was or how I'd gotten there. And he pulled me into his arms and kept saying, 'I did this for you, Lucy. For us.'" She hiccuped, revealing the deep pain in her deep blue eyes. "And would tell me, 'You always said you wanted to come to Atlanta again. Where we met. Said that these city lights chased out demons.' And he just kept repeating, 'I did this for you, Lucy. I did this for you.'"
I placed my hand on her knee, attempting to soothe her traumatized mind. "Mama, I didn't--"
"I came home because I realized that I made a huge mistake. Somehow some part of my brain chose him. Why?" She bit her lip. "You guys have always been there. Harper, I told you to hold that bottle loose and you did."
"Actually I chucked it off our roof."
She laughed through her tears. "See, all your father ever did was hold that bottle close. He'd take those pills to forget me. Why was I so blind? When he handed me that whiskey on the night he came back here, why did I drink it? Why did I promise to run away with him when I couldn't even see straight?"
I shook my head. "Mama--"
"Harper, Lindsey, I'm so sorry. I didn't know he left you with nothing. And I swear I'm not leaving again. I'm finally going to be the mother my children deserve."
YOU ARE READING
Free Fall. // l.r.h.
Fanfiction"We are all broken. That's how the light gets in." ~Ernest Hemingway
