Luna Clark

Chapter 18

I wake up Tuesday morning in the couch. Angelina has placed a blanket on top of me. I look at the clock hanging at the wall. 4am. I check my Instagram for while. An hour later Angelina comes downstairs wearing her casual outfit. Her hair is placed into a ballerina bun. I notice she hasn't done her makeup yet.

''Good morning'' She greets me with a smile.

''Good morning'' I saw and yawn.

I slept for about 12 hours and I'm still tired. Why do I feel like this?  I ask  myself. I was doing so fine the past month. I don't feel like ever leaving this house again. I don't feel like getting ready. I don't feel like having to socialize with people. Today's just not my day.

''At what time are you coming back?'' I ask her.

Angelina seems to read my mind. Her lips press together and her eyebrows give me a frown. I know this look. She would look at me like this when I was 6 years old and I didn't want to go school. She seems to understand me, for once.

''I have some paperwork to finish at the office...'' She says.

I look down and bite my bottom lip. Of course she is gonna be home late. Of course she has some paperwork to finish. Of course she will be spending the rest of her life inside that stupid building, eyes behind a screen, and smoking cigarettes during her free time. There's nothing more important than making money from her perspective of life.

''But, '' She begins.

I stare at her eyes and I smile.

''I can ask my boss to give me an extra day to finish the paperwork, so we can spend the evening together'' She says.

''The evening...'' I repeat and look down.

''Can we move away?'' I ask randomly.

''What?'' She replies surprised.

Angelina sits next to me on the couch. She gives me that look again. Oh gosh, now she must be feeling bad for me. I bite my bottom lip and look into her blue eyes.

''I hardly see you...'' The unspoken words finally come out.

''Luna...'' She whispers.

She places her palm on my knee. I feel her cold fingers against the fabric of my sweatpants. She looks down. No words come out of our mouths for a few minutes. I just sit there in silence, waiting for her to talk to me. Waiting for her to tell me how much she loves me. Waiting for her to be my mom.

''I'm sorry...''

A tears roll down her cheek from wide luminous eyes. I can see the pain when I look into her eyes. In that moment I realize, she's broken. She's been hiding her broken soul for a long time now. Time hasn't healed her pain, but has taught her to hide it.

''I.....'' The unspoken words can't leave her lips.

I hug her tight.

''I miss him too...''

Her eyes grow wider to the tone of my voice. I tried to hold in it, but I start to cry my eyes out.

''Every night before I go to sleep...I imagine him being there, laying next to me and I just''

I can't believe she's sharing this with me.

''I love you'' I tell her and wipe my tears.

''I love you too'' She whispers to my ear and kisses my forehead.

In between tears she gives me a warm smile. One of those smiles, the ones that come deep from the heart.

''You should get ready for school'' She tells me without looking directly at me.