Salim and Kayal #Watty's 2016 # YourStoryIndia #ProjectWomanUp

Choose your fights wisely

Salim's POV

Even though I haven't looked at Kayal's face yet, she is the one who is constantly occupying my thoughts. I can now recognize her voice among all the 25 of us. She speaks very boldly when she has to speak with Professors. She has a very sweet voice when she has to speak with her friends Sara and Jaanu. When boys approach her she speaks in a friendly way, but still maintains her distance. I have never seen her touching any guy, except for an occasional handshake. I wonder how she will say my name.

John has some feelings for Sara. He likes Kayal in a friendly way. Harneet also chats with them. But, I try to avoid their chatting sessions and start reading something. One day, I was irritated at my heart for constantly thinking about her. It is my habit to draw doodles whenever I am feeling confused. So, I started making doodles in the last page of my notebook. Break was over and a Professor was about to start a lecture when I looked at my doodle properly. I had doodled Kayal's name in Tamil with a question mark. I got frustrated with myself.

In the evening, I realized that simply lowering my gaze when my thoughts are filled with her wouldn't serve any purpose. So, I decided to take Allah's (SWT) help. That night after my prayer, I made my mind to fast on Mondays and Thursdays. Next day was Thursday. I got up early in the morning for my prayers and then I went down to meet the cook of our hostel. Only on that day I found out that food is never cooked in our hostel. It comes from the girl's hostel. Over here only beverages are served. When I told the cook that I was fasting and I need to eat before sunrise, he offered to make me tea. I didn't want to move back from my fast. So, I had a big cup of tea. Shops and hotels might not be opened this early in the morning. This was again a test from Allah.

John was anxious to know why I was skipping breakfast. John asked, "Ali, tell me why are you fasting now?"

I mostly avoided saying lies. So I told him, "I need Allah's help for something which I am trying very hard for. Yesterday, I decided to fast on Mondays and Thursdays".

"What are you trying very hard for? Tell me the truth."

"No John, it is between me and Allah. I can't say that to you."

"Well if you are not going to tell me the truth I am going to tear this". He was having my Assignment. Today I have to submit it to Trivedi Sir. If at all if I miss my submission I will be a dead meat and I am sure he will insult me in front of the whole class. I don't want to get insulted in front of Kayal. The Printer room is in another end of the campus and it opens in the afternoon only. And our first class is of Trivedi Sir.

"Okay John. I will tell you. Please keep that down."

"Tell me fast. We have to rush for our classes."

"I am fasting because I want to stop thinking about Kayal all the time."

He was surprised now, "you haven't even spoken to her yet. And you tell me that you want to starve yourself so that you can put her off from your mind. What do you mean?"

"These days I am not able to think about anything else other than Kayal. I haven't even seen her face yet. But, I keep on thinking about her which is Haraam in Islam. That is why I am fasting so that I can seek Allah's help to concentrate on anything other than Kayal."

"What's wrong with you man? If you like her so much, why don't you go and talk to her? You can get to know her, if she loves you back, eventually you can even marry her."

"In Islam it doesn't work that way. We can't marry non muslims. I assume she is an atheist."

"No she isn't an atheist. Because every now and then she says Thank God. I know she might not be a Muslim but you can always talk to her and convert her to your religion right? That is if both of you love each other."