The Journal (Phan)

Three

My head felt fuzzy and my mouth was dry. My eyes burned slightly when I opened them. I pulled the duvet over my head to block the light and after a while my eyes were fully open. I threw the bedding off me and sat up, cringing slightly. I looked over to my alarm clock. It was 12:49 and something felt off. I stood up and stretched. My back popped and I popped my knuckles. I grabbed my phone and saw it was blown up with Tumblr notifications. My phone said that it was Saturday the 14th. That meant that I slept for two whole days. I missed school again. I got out of bed and went to the dresser. Once I had an outfit I made my way to the bathroom. I needed a shower.
"Hurry up" I banged on the door to whoever was inside. Instantly assuming it was Adrian. There was no response back and I leaned against the wall. I pulled out my phone and scrolled through Tumblr. After a few minutes the bathroom door opened.
"Finally! What in bloody hell were you doing?" I asked Adrian as he walked out. His hair was wet and his face was red. He ran down the hallway and I was about to walk into the bathroom when someone else came out, running directly into me.
"Sorry" They mumbled. Their hair also being wet. It took some staring and a much longer process moment then needed to realize this was a boy.
"What were you guys doing?" I asked in utter shock. I immediately slapped my forehead the moment I asked it. Both boys hair was wet and they came out of the same bathroom at the same time. Obviously they showered together. The boy was blushing a deep red and I just sighed. I moved out of the doorway letting him slip past. I didn't want to shower anymore. Not in that shower, who knows what goes on in that shower. I took my clothes back into my room and threw them on the bed. I started to strip and wiggle into my skinny jeans. Before I was able to get a shirt on my door was opened.
"Oh my god" A familiar voice chuckled. I squeaked and rushed to get a shirt on, failing and getting it stuck over my head. He sighed and I felt him walking towards me. I was still struggling with my shirt and couldn't see anything. Then I felt hands helping me maneuver the T over me head and correctly onto my torso. I cringed away from him and he smiled.
"Your cute. Not my type but cute" He laughed. His silver hair shining in the light of my room. I blushed slightly and hid my face.
"What are you doing in my room" I said before thinking it over. "What are you doing in my house" I reworded the question he laughed and a smirk played on his face.
"My brother and your brother are on the same soccer team. I came to drop off Ki when I noticed how much your brother looked like you then I found out it was the Howell residence and the last name rang a bell so I asked Adrian. He told me you were his brother and here I am" He explained. I looked away from him and realized what a mess my room was.
"But they....were in the shower....together" I whispered the last part. He looked at me and evaluated my facial expressions. He then chose his words carefully.
"Look Dan sometimes boyfriends do that. They were baking and made a huge mess and needed to shower. It's not like anything happened. They weren't in there long enough to have sex and they are both to shy and innocent for that anyway" He laughed slightly. I gasped at the word boyfriend and sex. Adrian doesn't have a boyfriend! He isn't even gay!!!
"I'm sorry I don't think you understand. My brother doesn't swing that way" I was dead serious and Tyler frowned slightly. He grabbed my hand and I pushed it away. "You and your brother have corrupted him! Don't touch me! I'm not gay" I practically screamed. I started to panic and breath heavily. Tyler didn't seem hurt by my words.
"Just follow me" He insisted. I reluctantly did so and he brought me into the living room where Adrian was laying on the couch with the other boy in his arms. I stomped infront of them and Adrian wouldn't meet my eyes.
"What are you doing" I hissed. He whimpered slightly and pulled Ki closer to him. "Dan, I'm sorry you found out this way" His voice was shaky and he still wasn't looking at me. He had his face buried in Ki's back.
"Find out this way?!? What in bloody hell is going on? One minute you are accusing me of being gay and the next it's you who's gay!" I yelled frantically at him. Ki weaseled out of Adrian's grip and stood next to Tyler. He whispered something into Tyler's ear and Tyler nodded.
"Dan we are going to leave. I'll tell Phil to come by later. You guys have some talking to do" Tyler said looking me dead in the eyes. I suddenly felt guilty at the mention of Phil. Here I am yelling at my younger brother for being with another man when I was looking at another man's ass just yesterday. There is a difference though. Adrian is gay, I'm not. I just happened to accidentally stare at Phil's cute butt longer than needed. No homo of course.
"Why do Phil and I need to talk? I have nothing to say to him" I snapped back. That was a lie. I liked being around Phil. He did most of the talking and didn't push me into stuff to much.
"Just be prepared for him at your door today" Tyler's eyes didn't leave mine and then him and his brother left. Adrian was staring at me. He was on the verge of tears. I felt as though I was to.
"I thought you out of all people would understand" He whispered more to himself than me. "I thought you would accept me. I thought you were my brother, my best friend. I thought you weren't ever going to judge me. I thought I could trust you" The last part was barely audible as he choked on his words. Seeing him fall apart like this only because of me was a knife to the heart. He was right. He had listened to me and not judged all of my craziness and the minute he tells me something meaningful I throw back into his face. I sat on the couch next to him and wrapped him in a hug.
"I'm so sorry Adrian. I don't know why I reacted that way! I'm just a little off base with myself. You have the right to love who ever you want and I accept that. I accept you" I was in tears and so was he. I can't believe I was such a jerk. Oh my god! Poor Tyler! Stuck in the middle of everything. I was so rude to him. I don't even know if he is a homosexual yet I was bashing him about it. I'm such an arse.
"He j-just means s-so much to m-me" Adrian sobbed into my shoulder. I felt so bad. I ran Adrian's boyfriend out of the house. I didn't even give anyone time to explain themselves. I moved Adrian so he was looking at me.
"Call him" I said. Adrian looked at me for a long time. He seemed to be searching my eyes. I'm not sure what he was looking for but I think he found it because he eventually smiled and gave a nod of determination.
I watched as Adrian stood up, phone in hand. He went into his room and closed the door behind him. I'm a horrible brother. I'll have to apologize to both Ki and Tyler for my actions. An apology just isn't enough though. I wish there was more I could do. More I could say to express how awful I felt.
I went into my room and began cleaning it up a bit. I never saw a reason to keep a clean room since I never had anyone over. Now I know what 'just in case' really means.
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After about an hour or so my room was fully clean. I made sure all my clothes were put nearly in the drawers or thrown into the hamper if dirty. Then I sat down at my desk and let out a long sigh. Needing a small release I pulled my leather journal out of its drawer and opened it. The sound of my pen on the paper was music to my ears.