Mark My Words

Chapter 17: Final Straw

I spent the rest of the day watching movies with Bella curled up in my lap. Around 6:00 pm, my parents got home.

“Jordin!” My mum shrieked. She ran over to me sitting lazily on the couch and gave me a huge hug. “Darling, I’ve missed you! Are you okay?”

“I’m fine,” I reassured her. Again, after the accident with Jonathan, my mom suffers from a great deal of anxiety. Anytime Josh or I go somewhere without her or my dad, she is constantly worrying. It can get a little annoying, but I would be the same way if I lost a child. I could never imagine the pain my parents feel since what I feel is bad enough. I’ll never get over the loss of my brother. “Thanks for taking care of Bella.”

“It was no big deal,” she smiled. “I’m just so glad you’re home safe. Did you have fun?”

“Sure,” I said.

She was expecting me to elaborate, I could tell. When I didn’t, she said instead, “Well how about I start supper?” She kissed me on the forehead and walked into the kitchen where my dad was already making a mess.

I figured my worries about Danielle could wait. For now, I had to check on Zayn. I called him and invited him over for supper. He was hesitant at first due to the rather long drive, but he came around eventually. I notified my parents of our guest and jumped in the shower, the place where I do my deep thinking.

I entertained the idea in my head that one of the boys could have slept with Danielle. Zayn and Liam weren’t candidates for me, considering Liam and Danielle never did it and Zayn was too recent. I only thought of Louis and Harry. I figured I should bring this up to Zayn before I acted on it. I shut off the shower, letting the warm water which was suddenly turning cold trickle down my body, giving me goosebumps. I quickly grabbed a towel and dried off.  I really didn’t feel like messing with my hair, so after I got dressed I pulled it back into a ponytail. Before I knew it, supper was almost ready and Zayn was at the door.

“Hi Zayn! Come in,” I opened the door wide and he walked in, arms open a bit for a hug. When I went to pull away, he held on and kissed my cheek.

“It’s so nice to see you.” I could feel him smile.

“It’s nice to see you too, but it’s only been a day.” He released me from the hug and shook his head. “Well this was the longest day ever. You’ll never believe w-“ he stopped talking once he saw Josh coming down the stairs. “Hey bud,” Zayn walked over to him and they did that guy handshake.

“Supper is ready,” my dad called. “Zayn, haven’t seen you in awhile, sir.” They shook hands the proper way. “Come and sit down.” Josh, Zayn, and I followed my dad into the dining room. The table sat six since we were a family of five, but it hadn’t actually held five or six people in years. No one sat in Jonathan’s chair, or Jonny, as I called him. I seriously missed that boy. Josh had the chair right next to Jonny’s. My parents took the ends and Zayn sat right next to me.

Supper was the same old boring small talk it always was when we had guests. The real talk started once the table was cleared and Zayn and I went to my room.

“Zayn, I have to tell you something. I’m not sure if I should be telling you, but I think you have a right to know,” I started. My stomach churned as I told him the whole story. I made sure to emphasize, “DANIELLE IS PREGNANT.”

Once I was finished, I couldn’t get him to look at me. “Well it’s not me,” was all he said.

“I know it’s not you. I never thought it was you.” I sat down on my bed next to him and gave him a hug.

When we stopped hugging, he grabbed my shoulders and looked my straight in the eyes and said, “It has to be Harry.”

I shook my head in disbelief. The public eye saw Harry as a womanizer, but I saw him for what he truly was… a cupcake. “How do you know? Err, what makes you think that?”

“Well Louis has himself a girlfriend,” Zayn huffed.

I sighed. “Is this still about Eleanor? There’s plenty of fish in the sea, if anything you should know.”

“I don’t want anyone else. No one will ever understand me like Eleanor does.” His gaze drifted wondrously.

“Oh,” I crinkled my eyebrows. “I didn’t know Eleanor was your best friend.” It did hurt, honestly. Zayn seemed to care more about Eleanor than he did about me. The whole trip to Mexico was a mistake. If I had never taken it, Zayn wouldn’t be so worked up over Eleanor and I wouldn’t be with Liam. Don’t get me wrong, Liam meant the world to me, but I wasn’t sure if he was worth all this drama with Danielle and the recent friendship woes with Zayn.

“Jordin, I really hate to tell you this, but you haven’t exactly been a good friend to me. Not lately, I mean.” I couldn’t believe what I’d just heard.

“What? Are you crazy? Sure, our situation is rather unique and I haven’t been with you 24/7, but that doesn’t mean I’m a bad friend by any stretch. You’re always the first person I go to when I need anything, and I’m so thankful I have you for that. I’d do the same but you always keep everything bottled up, and that’s not my fault.”

“It’s your fault for not being easy to talk to,” he retorted.

“This is a fucking joke, right? Like you’re just messing with me? You better be, because I’ve had it with you. Stop moping around and enjoy life for once. You have your family, your four best mates in a band with you, and me. You don’t need this dumb girl who clearly thinks nothing of you.”

“See? You just constantly bring me down.”

“Yeah, I bring you back down to Earth. Get your head out of the clouds, Zayn. Your life is pretty damn good. Some people have it a lot worse,” I held back my tears because I knew what was coming next.

“Sorry my brother didn’t die when he was seven. Sorry I wasn’t the one who was supposed to be watching him and his twin when he fell into that damn river. I’m sorry I wasn’t suicidal for 5 years. I’m sorry I made it on the X Factor. I’m sorry your boyfriend has a fucked up life and one kidney. I’m sorry I don’t butt into everyone’s business. I’m sorry my life isn’t as sad as yours. My bad. By the way, I called up your cousin Perrie. I scheduled a date, figured it might help me with my problems that you couldn’t give a shit about. I want you to know I plan on screwing her, too. Sorry I’m not a prude like you. Oh wait, you’re not a prude, you went and had sex with Frankie because you were angry with Liam. That makes a lot of sense, doesn’t it? I’m sorry you have this strange idea of what a relationship should be like because the boy in high school who popped your cherry didn’t want to marry you. I’m sorry your best friend betrayed you. I’m sorry my slate isn’t as clean as yours. Yes, Jordin, I’M sorry for being a shitty friend. Because you’re perfect. And because my life wasn’t as sad as yours, I have no right to want something more? What kind of fucking sense does that make?” He was in such a fit of rage, it took him awhile to realize what he had said to me, his best friend. “Jordin, I,”

“Get out.” I buried my face in my palms.

“Jordin?” He whispered, lowering down to my level and trying to sit back down on the bed.

“GET THE FUCK OUT!” I hit him as hard as I could and shoved my face into my pillow. I didn’t hear him say anything else to me. The door slammed downstairs and that was it.