Cold Mask (Kylo Ren X Reader)

Chapter 11

Who is he? What is he? Does he really seem that dangerous? Is he a monster, or is he a human being? Why must I feel this attachment for one so broken?

Kylo has become more distant, harder to approach, more defensive. He builds this high wall, refusing anyone's help or compassion. But yet, you dismiss his reclusiveness, his rejection for help. He is good and you want him to see that, embrace the light. Embrace the connection, the bond you can feel between you and him.

Even for you it's hard to understand the strong feeling for Kylo. The connection you must have with him. But why? All these questions confuse you even more.

But why?

"I can help you," You told him, during training one day. "You feel it, please. Let me in, let me help." You pleaded, reaching for his hand, for reassurance. Yet again, the wall was built higher. "Will you stop?! Who I was or who I now am, is none of your concern!" He turned away and gritted his teeth. "I have no 'bond' with you, no 'connection'. You mean nothing to to me, all you are is my apprentice and the only thing you need to worry about, is learning what I teach." He turned back towards you, no hint of emotion. "So leave me alone, dammit!" With that, he once again left.

His words that day, struck you. They said one thing, but meant something else. Ever since day one, you could read his eyes, and they always told you the true story and this time they said, "Help me, please. No matter what I say..."

A few more weeks passed after that. You've been keeping a slight distance, becoming more wary of things you say. Kylo wasn't much trouble, he always acted as if nothing ever happened, until you asked a question, one that struck a nerve in Kylo. He was teaching you the history of Dark Lords. You kept staring at him, bored, as he was explaining something about the family trees of siths, and how the force is passed through generation to generation.

Then it came to you, who is Kylo's parents? You piped up and asked the question, perhaps was the one you should've asked long ago.

"Who are your parents, Kylo?" Once you said this, it seemed to have paralyzed Kylo, for he froze after the last word was uttered. Hurt, anger, sadness, and fear painted his features. Kylo quickly stood up to leave, but you did not want to be pushed away, not again. "No Kylo!" You yelled and grabbed his arm. Once you came into contact with him, darkness flooded your vision.

"Ben," an unfamilar male's voice echoed through your head, "Your uncle Luke will take good care of you, I promise." "Dad?" a young, slightly familiar voice, answered back. "I will see you again, right?"

"Of course, kiddo. We will see you sooner than you think, and when we do, you will be all grown up and a Jedi." The little boy giggled. "I will become the most powerful Jedi! I promise to make you and mom proud!" The older man chuckled. "You already have." Then a small pause hung in the air. "I love you, Ben Solo." The man cut the silence. "I love you too, father!" Replied the child.

A female voice broke in, "Han, our boy is all grown up!" Her voice cracked and she sniffled. "Don't cry Leia, our boy will be home before we know it!" The male voice cooed. "Bye mom, bye dad!" The voices faded away.

Suddenly a scream pierced your ears. Yells and cries flooded your mind. The screams of children, innocent children. Then, you heard a lightsaber, slaughtering the terrified kids. "BEN! DON'T, PLEASE!" A voiced wailed, begging for mercy. You heard a slash, then nothing.

Your vision returned gradually, only for you to see Kylo hunched over with his head in his hands. You could hear a stifled sob, it was coming from him. Your gazed locked onto his pitiful figure, he was the man who killed those children, innocent people. Anger bubbled inside you, but the sound of Kylo's sobs, made you feel sorry for him, sympathy. Your face softened and you placed a hand on Kylo's back, causing him to tense up. Though, he didn't refuse your comfort.

"Leia, General Leia. She's your mother, and you're...Ben?" You whispered. Kylo nodded slowly. You finally understood, he was being torn apart, light to dark. "S-So Darth Vader..." You trailed off, as Kylo pushed your hand away.

"I-I always feel it, the call, the pull to the light. It's become stronger, I couldn't figure out why, until just then. It's because of you..." He looked up into your eyes. Tears stained his pale cheeks, he looked like a kicked puppy. Lost and hurt.

"Kylo...I..." You didn't know what to say, you never thought he would actually let you in. You noticed your hand, hovering over Kylo's shoulder. You hesitantly moved your hand away, but to your surprise, Kylo grabbed it. After a few short moments, he pulled you into a tight hug, a strong force flowing through him into you. You felt paired with him, connected.

You could feel his chest rising and falling in symphony with his small sobs. His heartbeat in sync with yours. His warmth emitting from his body. The power was overwhelming, you felt like one person, combined with him.

"Y/n?" Kylo whispered. "Yes?" You replied softly. "The connection, I-I feel it too." He sighed quietly, "Our bond..."