The Invisible Hand - A crime novel

Chapter 40

Sam puts the knife back in the peanut butter jar. Looks me square in the eyes. Never blinks. Not once.

"At training camp. I'm in the shower by myself. A guy comes in. Outranks me by quite a bit. Puts his hands all over me. Doesn't go further than that. Leaves. Same thing happens again and again. Training went to hell from there," Sam says. Doesn't speak the words. Sheds them. "I knew he took three vitamins every day from the same bottle. Long, white pills. So I ordered some synthetic dope off the Internet. Long, white pills. Swapped them for the vitamins. Didn't stick around after that. Just hit the road. Heard on the news he died a couple days later. Heart attack."

No wonder she waited to tell me. Had to see if I would rat her out.

But that's not the first thing in my mind. It comes out my mouth. I immediately regret it.

"Why didn't you tell someone? Turn him in?" I say. "It's not worth losing your shot in the Guard, right?"

I must sound like an asshole. Blaming the victim.

Sam shakes her head.

"He was one of those lifers. Been there forever. Just pushed papers. Everyone loved him," she says. "Well, not everyone."

"You think you really killed him?" I say.

Sam shrugs.

"Maybe luck killed him. I took his lucky raccoon penis jewelry when I swapped the pills. It's lucky for me now. I can rest my conscious on that instead of the pill thing," she says. Flicks the grotesque gold totem on the chain around her neck.

I nod. Makes sense now. But I can't help but wonder one thing.

"OK, this isn't me being a dick. Honest question. Why'd you swap his pills? Why not just leave anyway?" I say.

Sam balls her hand into a fist. Squeezes tight. It shakes when she talks.

"If someone punches you, you punch back, right? That's fair?" she says.

"Yeah, that's fair," I say.

"This was worse than a punch. So I hit back. Right in his heart. That's fair," Sam says.

Can't argue with that.

"He deserved it then," I say.

Sam unclenches her fist. Nods.

"I tried to go back to a regular life after that. Nothing clicked. Lost faith in the rules. They're only there to protect the people who benefit from those breaking them," Sam says. "Figured I'd disappear into the oil boom up here instead. Make my own rules. My own life. Free from getting fucked over by the economy and the boss man. I won't ever let that happen again."

Sam leaves it at that. So do I.

We clean up and head back to bed. It's a good thing. We'll need the rest for tomorrow.

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